TOUGH GOING - 3 WEEKS, 4 DAYS OLD

I really am trying to do blogging but it would seem that my evenings are going to be taken up with feeding, burping and changing. I can't type one handed so I'm just going to have to try and do some during the day, hence this entry which I'm manically trying to type out while Oscar is sleeping, Ellis is watching TV and Leo is in hospital with Daddy. Long story which will eventually be told.

So just to catch up, things are still manic at home. I'm recovering well but I have been over doing it recently and I'm achy and sore by the evening. I keep forgetting that I am recovering from surgery.

The health visitor phoned to arrange an appointment but then I had a further call a few days later to say that they had to rearrange it and it isn't until tomorrow now so I haven't seen anyone for ages now! I have no idea how heavy Oscar is.

So yes, he now has a name. Oscar Wallace, and we will be registering him tomorrow afternoon. I didn't force the issue with Rob, I just asked him to consider it and he said that I could have it. The middle name became an issue again but Rob eventually got bored of thinking about names so agreed Wallace too. I said if we have another baby, he can name it, unless it's a girl then I must have a say.

I'm working on my birth story and subsequent days in hospital but it's slow going and the entries are going to be massive!

I'm still rather large, 13st 2lbs yesterday and my normal weight is around 11st 7lbs so have a long way to go yet.

I managed to get my size 12 jeans on on Saturday. I really couldn't breathe, bend or sit down though and they wouldn't be comfortable to wear for a long time but it was a nice boost for me. That being said, my eating is terrible! I can't stop eating chocolate and cake etc. It's really not like me.

My hair hasn't started to fall out yet which is great and my bleeding stopped a couple of weeks ago which was really early I thought.

The scar is looking quite good. There is one area that hasn't healed yet but it's getting there. My belly is minging though and always will be.

I've put my wedding ring back on but it is still rather tight. Engagement ring will definitely not fit for a while yet. I'm not ready to diet or watch my eating. I just have too much on my mind to worry about it.

Rob went back to work, just for Thursday and Friday morning and my Mum came over to stay with us to help out, because I still can't lift Leo and I can't drive. It was great to have her here.

I slept on the sofa the night Mum was here. It actually worked really well as I didn't have to get in and out of bed to reach Oscar and I was really comfortable. I tried it Saturday night too but it don't go very well at all. Oscar just ate and ate and ate and wouldn't settle, not even on me. I think he may have been trying to increase my milk supply as I had none left on the night time but I have noticed that yesterday and today my boobs seem fuller. They will hopefully die down a bit soon.

Oscar is a very very windy baby and so I decided to give Infacol a go. It may do nothing but it makes me feel better that I'm doing something. He is screaming now because of wind and it makes things very tricky as in between feeds he doesn't really sleep soundly for any amount of time. It's still early days I know and I'm sure things will improve. You really do forget how hard the early days are.

Just having a newborn baby would be hard on it's own but we have Ellis and Leo too. The pressure has really been put on us recently with me having the section, Rob being ill, Leo and Ellis were ill then they got better, then when Mum was staying with me Ellis hurt his ankle and had to go to A&E then Leo fell from his stool and hit his head then started to be sick, so he went to A&E and has since been sick again so has gone back to A&E today! It all happens at once! Ellis is still limping away and running with his foot turned in, Rob is still at A&E as I type this but should shortly be coming home, I'm sore and achy from doing too much yesterday and today and Rob is struggling too. We seem to be quite up beat though considering everything.

I'm really not looking forward to Rob going back to work. It's going to be hard.

HORRENDOUS - 35 WEEKS, 2 DAYS

Last Tuesday, 1st February I was just 34 weeks pregnant I attended my first antenatal class and Naomi came to pick me up. I had started to have some back pain that morning which felt more like sciatic nerve pain then anything else and my pelvis at the front wasn't stinging so it was like it had moved and changed. I was struggling to walk and I wasn't particularly happy about it.

The class was run by Judith, my midwife, so she spoke to me quite a bit as she knew me and she had to discuss labour, without complications. I actually thought she did a good job and the only thing I didn't really like was when she said that they won't talk about breathing as surely she doesn't need to teach us how to breathe! So glad I have active birthing classes to go to.

I was still feeling horrid when I got home and walking, bending or pretty much just moving was becoming more and more of an issue.

By Wednesday I couldn't move and was in a lot of pain. Thankfully Sarah kindly took Ellis to school for me and then Mum came over in the afternoon, picked Ellis up and took him to his music class. So pleased to have had the rest but it didn't do any good and I was still in agony the following day.

In all my pregnancies, I have never wished any of them away but last week was just horrendous. I was in so much pain and I couldn't even live my life! I just wanted baby out! I was done, ready for it to be over.

I spoke to my midwife and she said they could prescribe Codine to help with the pain but it would cross the placenta to the baby so decided against that and then I spoke to the physio who said I was doing everything right and that I just had to put up with it really. I was doing everything I could to move the baby off my back, which is where I thought it was. I was leaning over my ball, doing ball dancing, going on all 4s which was when I was in the most pain so didn't do that too much.

Anyway, Saturday arrived and Rob let me have a lie in but then I just ended up staying in bed all day. I got up at about 4:30pm, gave Leo some dinner then got ready to go out. The pain was still there but not too bad.

On Sunday I was feeling so much better! We went into town and did quite a lot of walking and I was ok. I walked slow but it wasn't painful and even my front pelvis pain was gone. I was worried that doing all the walking would cause the pain to come back on Monday but, touch wood, since then I have been doing really really well. I feel really great actually, fat and bloated, achy and waddling a good un but not in pain. I get twinges but they are nothing compared to what I was getting.

So that's the sciatic pain story and now on to my Braxton Hicks. Thursday evening at Mum and Dads' I was having dinner and they started. I was getting hot flushes and a rock hard bump. It wasn't nice but easy to deal with. Then on Saturday night I was getting loads and loads, with some period pains too so I was almost thinking of timing them and they were keeping me awake too. I told Rob about it and he had a mini panic attack ;o)

I've had them since then but nothing as bad. Maybe the contractions helped to move baby off of the nerve it was sat on and that's why I can walk and move again.

I'm still obsessing over the position of the baby. I try all the time to work it out but I just can't. I mainly think he is transverse with his head on the left side. Seeing the midwife next Wednesday so hopefully she can work it out a bit better, if not I want a scan.

Rob has been helping out loads which is great as I'm starting to need the extra rest time and sleep isn't going so well. I can't get comfy, my hips ache, turning over is an arse and Rob still squashes me and pushes me to the edge of the bed. I wake up tired most mornings.

Baby clothes from newborn to 3 months are all pretty much washed. I have another load of washing, some ironing to do and then it all just needs putting away. I still haven't done my hospital bag and plan to do that this weekend coming.

I am so puffy that I can't even wear my wedding ring anymore and Mum came over today and said "what lovely chubby cheeks!" Great! I'm sulking now and wanting to eat everything in sight.

Naomi phoned me today, (I hope she doesn't mind me putting this) about some heavy discharge she was having and was wondering what to do. She is 36 weeks pregnant today. She was waiting for a call back from her midwife and I just said to put a pad on and to keep an eye on the volume and colour of it. She said she didn't want to open her packet of pads yet, which was quite funny. I tried to reassure her that everything was fine and that even if her waters had gone, there is still time and to not panic. I sent her a text an hour or so later asking her how she was and she replied that her waters had gone!!! I can't believe it! She is now in hospital waiting for baby. I am assuming that if nothing happens within a few days that they will induce her and get baby out. So she will be holding her baby in a few days time, or sooner! So strange that we won't finish our antenatal classes together and we were joking about being in hospital at the same time but that isn't going to happen. I just hope that everything works out well for her and baby and I can't wait to receive "the" text.

I've decided to revamp my birthing plan. For one thing I'm going to call it my wish list and I just want to make it very simple but with a few things on there that I know I don't want. Like I don't want them to keep asking me if I want to have my waters broken. I birthed out my bag of waters with Leo and she constantly asked if she could brake them and I didn't want it done. It just seemed so unnecessary. If the bag wanted to break then it would itself and also I didn't want the contractions to kick up a notch which can happen with no water to cushion the blow. So will work on that and post an updated version soon.

I still have loads to do and keep putting it off cause I just think baby will come late as per the 2 boys and that I have plenty of time yet. Naomi thought she would be early but not this early!

Antenatal class this week was good too. It was taken by Marcia who I really like and she is very organised and energetic which makes it much better. It was about complications and pain relief. Again she did say the thing about they won't teach us how to breathe but other than that it was informative and positive considering it was to do with complications.

I stayed behind to ask a couple of questions and she was very helpful. I asked about the fact that I had a very full bladder at the time of pushing and asked if that could have caused my slight bladder prolapse and she said yes. She said it might also have caused me to have to push so damn hard to get him out as the gap would have been compromised by the full bladder. I asked about the cannula too and if I did actually need one in place straight away and said yes I would need one but could sign a waiver form and not have it. Choice is mine. She then suggested I meet with Steph Withers at the hospital to discuss my options a bit further. I might do that.

Have the consultant appointment on Tuesday. Think I may go anyway but won't bother getting Rob to take the day off. Shazza was having the boys so that I could go to my antenatal class and Naomi said that she could help out to cover the extra time that I would be at the hospital. That aint gonna happen now though. Will have to sort something out.

Feeling okay. Thankful to not be in major pain and looking forward to seeing baby but also scared to death about it all. I'm not worried about pain but worried about how it will all work out, what will happen this time sort of thing and then I worry about recovery and how the boys will deal with etc etc. I can't stop worrying and stressing. How can I get around that? My head is all confused and emotions are very close to the surface. I'm sure it will all work out but it's the not knowing that is doing me in.

So tired and I need to shower and wash my hair. Actually might just go to bed and wash my hair tomorrow while Leo is napping. Yeh that's a plan.

35 WEEKS - 35 WEEKS

Again I have left it too long between posts and I have so much to write about. I was going to do a video diary but I can't be doing with the processing of the videos when I have so much to talk about. At least this way I can stop myself from waffling so much.

Just going to do the 35 week measurements and pictures in this post and then will do another entry soon to cover the last 10 days or so.

Measurements with Nugget:

Weight - 14st 1lb (+ 2st 5lb!!!!!!) I knew I would make up for the lack of eating at Christmas! I've put on 11lbs in 5 weeks! SHIT! That can't be right can it?!

Tummy - 112cm (18.5cm)

Upper arm - 29cm

Upper leg - 64cm (3cm)

Ankle - 25cm (1cm)

Neck - 35cm (2cm)

Measurements with Leo:

Weight = 13st 6lb

Tummy = 111cm

Upper arm = 29cm

Upper leg = 63.5cm

Ankle = 24.5cm

Neck = 34cm

Bump picture while pregnant with Ellis.

So there you have it. I'm a huge beast!

LIST - 32 WEEKS, 3 DAYS

I have an expanding list of things I want to talk about on here so I better get on with it before I forget what I wanted to say. It won't really flow as I'm following a list and will just write about each one.

Gas - with my first 2 pregnancies I always had gas going up and down but this time around I haven't suffered from it and luckily, so far, I haven't had any indigestion which is great.

Aches & Pains - everyone gets them I'm sure. This time I have been getting lower back ache if I've been standing for a long time but to be honest I get that when I'm not pregnant too. It isn't too bad though. The biggest issue is the burning, stinging, stabbing pelvis pain. Sometimes it is horrendous. The worse time by far is when trying to get comfy in bed or turning over, oh and getting dressed and undressed. It is so painful and you know you have to feel it as you have to move. So I just grit my teeth, feel the pain and usually groan or let out some air. It isn't nice and I will stop going on about it but I have to write about it as a reminder for next time! ;o)

Preparing siblings - I feel like I haven't done enough of this with Leo and too much with Ellis. Ellis is always asking when is baby Ben going to arrive, is it spring yet etc etc and Leo just knows that my tummy is called baby. Pretty sure he doesn't know that there is a baby in there and that it will be coming out and home with us. I think he will be in for the biggest shock. Ellis really wants to be a helper and I hope he does as I will need it.

Baby position - I pretty much have no idea of baby's position other than the fact that all movement, kicks, prods etc is down on my c-section scar and below. It is so strange how low it is and it doesn't feel nice at all. I know there is time for baby to get in a proper position but it would be nice to feel some good movements and legs/arms sticking out etc. I have a midwife appointment in just under a week so should know more then, hopefully.

Rob has actually looked into purchasing an ultra sound machine so that I can put my mind at rest as I obsess about it every day. They go for £900 which isn't bad really as you can re-sell it. I've told him not to obviously.

Size - I've been told conflicting things about how I look size wise. Some say I look massive then go on to say but it's all up front and you don't look pregnant from behind. One lady today said I hardly looked pregnant! People say I don't look like I have put on any extra weight! Seriously! It would be nice to be made to feel better but when you know you have gained so much extra fat on your arse and thighs and I'm bloated everywhere else, you wonder why people are fibbing so badly. ;o) I just have to look at my hands I know I'm big.

Getting ready - Right, so I've started to do the washing and ironing and putting the clothes into Leo's current room. All of Leo's clothes are now in with Ellis' which makes it so much easier. I've been out shopping and bought a few bits, ordered the mattress and bought myself some pads and arnica. I've written a very long list of stuff for the hospital bag but I don't remember taking that much stuff last time. I'll post the list on here soon. Need to do a birthing plan, clean the crib, finish sorting the clothes, sort out a car seat as current one is broken, pack hospital bag and I also need to work out what I'm going to do if labour starts and Rob is away etc. I mean Mum and Dad are 20 minutes drive away so add on getting out the house, 30 minutes, and Uncle Dave isn't much closer, if I can get hold of him. Sally has kindly said she would let me know when she could be free which is great as she is a lot closer, but it is still a worry. Hopefully it will start Friday afternoon or something, that way Rob will be home and I won't have to worry about any of it. I seem to have quite long labours but this time might be really fast, you just never know and it's best to be prepared.

AB Classes - went back to my first active birthing class on Tuesday. I made the silly mistake of walking down the very dark lane to get to the barn, ended up scaring the shit out of myself, causing me to run and hurt my pelvis. The class went well though. We heard a birth story at the beginning, drank tea, ate chocolate, talked about breathing techniques at the end for 2 minutes and introduced ourselves etc. It was really nice to be back but strange at the same time. I felt like a know it all and I sat there nodding my head a lot of the time. I'll keep going for now as it is nice to think about this baby and this pregnancy and I do need to get my head prepared for the labour of labour.

Appetite - this is going up and down and all over the place. Some days I really could just drink water all day and be fine, other days 2 chocolate bars, 3 packets of crips, tons of fruit etc are just not enough. I haven't weighed and I don't intend to until 35 weeks. I think with Leo I weighed a lot so was much more conscious of what was happening but this time I'm just going with the flow. Not worried about weight gain at all as long as I don't go stupid. I'm pretty sure I can lose it again with a bit of will power and I'm planning to do it by having an eating plan ready so that I can stick to it. It's something like this:

Breakfast - Porridge or Oat cereal with a banana

Fruit snack mid morning

Lunch - Sandwich with low fat crisps and yoghurt or soup with 2 bits of toast and yoghurt

Healthy mid afternoon snack

Dinner - Not overly fussed about this but pasta and sauce or fish or something like that.

I'll make sure to drink plenty of water too as I will hopefully be breastfeeding and will need to keep hydrated.

Cravings - I really want to be crunching away on some crushed ice just like I did with Leo but unfortunately we don't have the ice dispenser hooked up so no ice. :o(

Boobs - these things are massive but I'm still in my normal bras. I do have 4 boobs though and they barely cover my nipples, but I'm still in them. I will switch to my bigger bras soon.

Spots - maybe it is to do with my appetite/eating but I have suddenly started to get lots of spots again. I usually get a few spots anyway but in recent weeks I haven't had any so I noticed them when they returned. Hopefully they will go again soon.

Swollen - now this is going to sound very strange but I'm sure this is pretty normal that my down below bits are a bit swollen. I think I remember having it with Ellis but not sure. It isn't uncomfortable or anything but just a bit weird. My legs, hands, feet, face and neck are definitely puffy. I have bad sock marks and my stringy bit as I call it from my big toe is slowly disappearing. Plus you can feel that your skin is being stretched. Oh the joys of pregnancy!

The boys - as the time of the new arrival is fast approaching I've become really aware that my chance to spend quality time with the 2 boys is diminishing very quickly and I'm feeling a little bit sad about it. I'm really trying my best to give them lots of attention and one on one time as soon Mummy time will have to be split again. Hopefully Daddy will take up the slack in the first couple of weeks so that I can settle into some sort of routine so that I can still spend good time with them as well as keep on top of everything else. I know this isn't going to be easy but I'll cope. I'll have to.

Done - I'm still pregnant and I already think that I'm done, as in 3 boys will be enough for me. As much as I would love to have a little girl, I don't think I can go through all this again for the very slight chance that it might happen. I've always said I wouldn't have children just to have a certain sex, and I stand by that. I would never say never though and it is just left open for now. Would have to see how it all works out anyway. I would want a slightly bigger gap too as I think my body needs a rest from pregnancy and/or breastfeeding, which it has been doing since October 2006! I will get rid of some stuff after this one. I will keep some special outfits and things but everything else can go.

32 weeks - In general I'm feeling good. Up and down emotionally, very paranoid and I feel like I'm not working hard enough on some of my friendships but I'm just very consumed with everything right now. It sounds like a rubbish excuse but I just can't fit everything in. That doesn't mean that I'm too busy doing other stuff it just means that I can't cope with it all. My brain is overloaded.

I really have a good waddle going on now and I'm aware of my posture changing to a slightly leaning back position. I try to hold myself up high, pull in those pesky muscles and walk with my knees sometimes knocking. Sounds mental right?

I feel like I'm nearly at the end but I do have almost 8 weeks left, but they are ticking by so quickly. I'm trying to cherish the pregnancy but to be totally honest, apart from the pain in my pelvis and the horrible kicks to my bladder, I haven't really had too much time to think about it. I really want to make sure that I bond with this baby quite quickly and that I don't just see him as a little machine to deal with in amongst what I usually do, if that makes sense. I want him to be part of everything and not just a new chore. That sounds terrible I know but I'm just worried about spreading the love. I'm sure it will be just fine.

I have seriously waffled on but I did say my list was rather long. I must admit I did add to it as I went along.

Feeling happy but disorganised. Once I'm sorted out I will feel a lot more settled. I think I remember going through a phase like this with both pregnancies. Worrying about being a good Mum, worrying about everything really.

Going to put my feet up now and switch off for a bit.

4D SCAN - 27 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

Today was the day of our 4D scan. I was pretty nervous and excited and not really sure what to expect.

The Mum's arrived and we said our goodbyes to the boys before getting in the new car to head to the appointment.

We left in plenty of time but we arrived at the clinic on time, not early. It didn't matter though as we didn't get called in until 4pm and our appointment was at 3:45pm. I do understand now though why we were a little late. I'll explain in a bit.

I had had a can of fizzy and a couple of chocolate bars to get the baby moving as this was what I was instructed to do. I had a full bladder too which isn't essential but if the baby is in a funny position, then going for a wee might help it to move.

We did the formalities of signing the declaration etc and then I hopped on the bed and warm gel was applied to my huge tummy. It was warm because it had been on the radiator.

They lady that did the scan was Natalie and she is actually a friend of Tilly's which was a bit strange to find out as she really wanted to ask me about it at the start of the session but we didn't find out until the end.

The first part was doing the usual 2D scan of just checking around, the sex of the baby (clearly still a boy) and its general health and position. Guess what? The baby is breech! I know there is plenty of time for it to move around and I so hope it does but in my gut I really think it won't. Time will tell on that, and like Sally said, at least I could blag another scan later on.

We did get a DVD of the whole thing and there is a part on there pointing out the fact that he is indeed a he. When I work out how to put it on here, I will. But I'm sure that will be after Christmas now unless I can get Rob to help me with it.

We then started to look at the 4D images. It didn't work how I thought it would. I assumed it would be the same as a normal scan but seeing it properly if you know what I mean. But what actually happens is, they find the face on the 2D image and then flick a switch, wait for it to work for a little bit and then you see what you get. A lot of the time there is a lot of black holes, which is where there is cord, hands, arms, and in our babies case, legs and feet! Yep his feet were up over his head, just like Ellis'.

We tried for a while to get something and I had to roll over onto my right side, then onto my left side, then back to my back but we still weren't getting any good face pictures. Natalie then said to go to the toilet, walk around, get a drink, jump up and down etc and come back in 15 minutes. This 15 minutes is why we were late going in as the girl before us had the same issue and had to go back to try again. We were very lucky with this and I will explain why again later on.

I went to the loo then went outside for a walk. I managed to grab Rob who was buying coffee for the Mum's and he bought me a tea. Hot tea always gets Nugget moving. I walked around a little bit more and then we went back in.

It wasn't fantastic but it was better than before. We managed to get a few good pictures.

I love this one!

Hand and foot in front of face. We could see his fingers and toes wiggle.

Here are some short videos of the scan too.

There was a really funny moment towards the end where we were watching his hand in front of his face and it looked like he was counting as he had a hand and foot there and Rob said he had got to 10 and needed to carry on. Then we said about him telling us to get lost and that we wouldn't be surprised if he gave us the finger. Seconds later he did! We all laughed, even the sonographer who apologised for doing so. I told her not to be silly and that of course she could laugh. Bless.

We were in there for ages and at the end when she said she was all done, she asked if I was happy and I said yes but could you please do it for 10 seconds more? Cheeky I know but I knew we were her last appointment and I just wanted one more glimpse of his chubby chops.

The Mums and Rob enjoyed it and we all agreed that it looked a lot like Ellis. There were times, especially from the side angle that it looked a bit like Leo but with the full lips, chubby nose and cheeks, I think it looked just like my first born. I hope the delivery doesn't end up the same though. I can't help myself freeking out about it a bit and I have already started to read up on ways to get the baby shifting. This one web site suggested these things!

1. Visualizing the baby moving down with the head very deep in your pelvis, several times a day; especially in conjunction with positions and exercises below.
2. Swimming as often as possible. This keeps your body and pelvis loose and relaxed. Do in conjunction with headstand below if you have help.
3. Headstand - with assistance and in a pool frequently as possible.
4. Breech Tilt - begin at 32-35 weeks gestation. Do 3 times daily for 10-15 minutes each time, when you have an empty stomach, and the baby is active. Prop one end of an ironing board securely on a sofa or chair 12 to 18 inches high (or may use slant board). Lie down, bend knees but keep feet flat on board. Relax, breathe deeply, avoid tensing. May also use pillows on a flat surface to raise hips 12-18" above shoulders. Gravity pushes the baby's head into the fundus, tucks it, and baby can then do a somersault to a vertex position.
5. CD/iPod headphones - place them inside mom's pants toward her pubic bone and play classical music for 10 minutes 6-8 times a day.
6. Flashlight - try moving slowly down from the top of the uterus toward your pubic bone while you are in a breech tilt position.
7. Massage - start with your left hand at the bottom of the abdomen and your right hand just above it. Move move your hands clockwise around the right side of your tummy. As your right hand reaches the top of your abdomen, slide the left one over your right and move it down the left side of your tummy. Your left hand leads as you you come full circle, continuing clockwise. Massage gently as you would to apply lotion. Massage for ten minutes or more up to several times each day.
8. Clothespin - place on the small toe of each foot at the outside corner of the toenail; sideways so that the toenail and toepad are stimulated for 30 minutes per day, this is an acupressure point that is a "moving down" point. You can also do this with just finger pressure as you remember to do it.
9. Motion Sickness band - place with the bead four fingerwidths above the inner ankle bone - another acupressure point that is used for stimulation of the uterus. Do not use this point if you are experiencing any pre-term labor.
10. Glass of orange or other juice - follow this with a side-lying position with your hips positioned higher than your feet. Babies move more after a sugar high!
11. Pelvic Tilt- with an ice pack on the top of your tummy on an empty stomach, 10 minutes twice a day. Do this while lying on your back on the floor with knees flexed and feet on the floor with three large pillows placed under your buttocks. Try this in conjunction with headphones and visualization.
12. Cat stretch - start with all fours, then lay your head and chest flat on the floor with your buttocks in the air, as you round your back and return to all fours.
13. Knee-chest position - by kneeling with hips flexed slightly more than 90 degree, but with thighs not pressing against your tummy and your head, shoulders and upper chest are flat on a mattress for 15 minutes every two waking hours for five days.
14. Belly Relaxing followed by Inversion - Partner places a shawl, sheet, towel or rebozo under mom's hips as she lays on the floor. Lift up on the corners of the cloth and shimmy her from side to side moving your hands up and down to wiggle her belly from side to side. These should be very small movements which mom should find very relaxing. Do this for about 5 minutes. Then mother kneels on the stairway landing. Walk your hands down 2 or 3 stairs into an all fours position; have your partner support your shoulders to balance you. Remain in this position for about 5-10 minutes or as long as comfortable. Also do this on an empty stomach.
The following techniques to turn breech babies to vertex involve the assistance of a specialist or medical professional:
15. Acupuncture - find a acupuncturist who is familiar with pregnancy and knows the points to stimulate for turning a breech baby.
16. Webster's Breech Technique - see a Chiropractor who is experienced in this technique.
17. External Version - this can be done in the hospital at about 37 weeks; see an Ob-Gyn for assistance and more information.

I'm just really hoping it doesn't come to any of that, but I suppose I ought to be prepared. I need to stop getting myself worked up about it for now as like everyone says there is plenty of time for it to turn. Just want to cry though. I'll snap out of it, just a bit tired from all the excitement.

We had to wait for the photos, CD and DVD before Rob brought the car to the door for us to go home.

The Mums watched a repeat of the DVD in the back of our new car on the way home, which was pretty cool.

At home we tried to talk to Ellis about it but he was too interested in the ipad. Will try again tomorrow.

Hands and feet are puffy again tonight. Looks like that might be here to stay until the end. I'm going to be massive just like I was with Ellis. Ah well.

I'm off to do some handstands!

25 WEEKS - 26 WEEKS, 3 DAYS

Right then here is my 25 week post when I am 26 weeks and 3 days pregnant. Better late than never!

Bump pictures and measurements first before chat.

Me with Ellis

Me with Leo

Me with Nugget.

Measurements with Leo

Weight = 12st 6lb
Tummy = 98cm
Upper arm = 29cm
Upper leg = 60cm
Ankle = 23.5cm
Neck = 33cm

Measurements with Nugget

Weight = 13st! (+1st 5lbs!!!! SHIT!) With Leo pregnancy I had put on 12lbs at this stage.

Tummy = 100cm

Upper arm = 29cm

Upper leg = 63cm

Ankle = 23.5cm

Neck = 33.5cm

So overall I am much bigger than my second pregnancy but I did start off from a higher level anyway. Never mind, I'm sure when I'm looking after 3 children aged 3 1/2 and below I won't have too much time to eat and the weight will come back off a bit quicker than before.

I've started to shop a bit for Nugget and I will soon be getting his room ready, after Christmas actually but I'm at least thinking about it.

The crib is in from the garage which needs a clean and I have to purchase a new mattress. I won't bother with mattress covers as I have loads. Will have lots of washing to do though.

I don't have much to buy really. The newborn vests and grows are barely used so they will be fine. The next size up I might get rid of some but then again I might not.

I managed to find a do do which I love. It's the same as Leo's but a different colour.

And I think I bought a coming home outfit as the one used for Leo and Ellis is too summery.

I've also bought a snow suit, which is lush! It isn't too thick so should get away with it for the first month. It didn't cost too much money so don't worry Sally.

I was supposed to see the physio and the midwife the week commencing 29th November but Leo was unwell, and still is, so I changed it and the midwife appointment was working out to be too much hassle right before Ellis' swimming lesson so I changed that too. She couldn't fit me in until 23rd December and I'll be just over 28 weeks by then. I haven't seen her since 16 weeks. That's a huge gap but normal for subsequent pregnancies apparently.

Pelvis pain has been up and down. Mostly up though and I can't complain. I do hobble about and I walk as though one leg is longer than the other. It also takes me a few steps when I get up to loosen up a bit so that I can walk freely. I haven't been wearing my stretchy bandage thing as I don't think I need it yet.

With this pregnancy I am certainly getting more painful muscle twinges. I only had it a couple of times with Leo. It's like an electric shock running down the right side of my belly button. I know it's to do with the diastases (which you can read about here) and it won't be getting better until baby is out.

Overall though at the moment I must admit that apart from hobbling and feeling a few twinges, stings etc I am feeling fine. I don't even notice I'm pregnant half the time and sometimes when I'm stretching first thing in the morning and Nugget gives me a "gentle" kick to the bladder I suddenly remember what is going on in there. Please don't think I don't think about him as I do, a lot.

My bump is massive! It really sticks out quite a long way, so does my arse and thighs mind you. I measured it yesterday, my bump that is, and I think I'm about 2 weeks over on my size! I hope I'm wrong. Ellis and Leo weren't huge babies though. They were both overdue, Leo was 8lb 1 1/2 ounces and Ellis was 7lb 13 1/2 ounces. Which is about average apparently.

I don't like the look of my bump this time for a few reasons. The excess skin from Leo hangs out at the bottom which is just plain weird and my stretch marks are horrific to me. I love looking at it with clothes on but unlike the first 2 pregnancies I tend to keep it covered up. I often catch Rob looking at it though and because I'm paranoid I think he is thinking the same thing but he says he loves it. He said he thinks it's the cutest bump I've had. That was sweet to say so.

Nugget is kicking a lot more but 99.9% of the movement is down towards my bladder and just above my pubic bone. It's very strange and I hope it moves up a bit soon so I can video some of the movement. I have had a go but it isn't working just yet. Still have time.

Boobs are huge too! They look funny really but I like them. Need to get down to Perfect Fit for a new under wired bra. I know I shouldn't be wearing one but I have to. I've not had any problems with milk supply with the first 2 and by the size of these things, I don't think I will this time either. I wonder how all that will go. When I got pregnant with Leo my boobs were still leaking and continued to do so for the whole pregnancy but this time they weren't leaking to start with and haven't started now either. Feeding Leo was a breeze in comparison to Ellis so I just hope we have the same again please.

I've started to get a bit of indigestion recently. Nothing major just a bit of acid reflux every now and then. I slept in a sitting up position the other night but that has only happened once. I'm sure more will come when baby grows a bit more.

Appetite is all over the place. Some days I'm so hungry I could just sit and eat but others like the last 2 days, I can take it or leave it.

I finally decided that I did want to go ahead with a 4d scan and so I am booked in to have one on the 18th December. I really can't wait! Mum's are coming too which will be nice and the boys are being looked after by Uncle Dave (Ellis) and Grandad Rennolds (Leo). We did want to go out for food after but Uncle Dave has to go out in the evening so we have to get back.

I am in 2 minds about posting the pictures and videos from the scan. I'm not sure if I want to keep my baby's face private or not. I share everything else (not the name) so was thinking about keeping that for us. But then I want to record it on here so I am having a dilemma. I'm pretty sure I will post it as I know very few people actually read this blog anyway.

We have also bought a new car again. Rob has picked it up but refuses to bring it back home until it has been cleaned as he is worried about my response. I know he likes it and he really wants me too, and I'm sure I will, but he just wants to make sure. It is a Land Rover Discovery 3, 2.7 tdi, 2004, automatic, dark blue, cream leather interior, it has TV screens in the back and lots of other stuff. This one we can't send back but the health check at the garage had a very positive report and we were lucky to get it as someone else couldn't get their funds together in time so it was offered to us instead. YAY!

Can't wait to meet my baba! But I'm also happy to wait if you know what I mean. I'll get a little glimpse in 9 days! That reminds me, I'm into double figures now for how long I have left. Scary stuff!

Going to start my Active Birthing classes soon and I would love for Naomi to come with me but pretty sure she isn't up for it. I just want her to come to one or two just to see what it's all about as I think you can be put off just by what it is called.

Starting my antenatal classes after Crimbo. I really want to go to them again as it's a bit of a refresher and hopefully I can help by sharing any experience that I may have. It's also nice to have a natter with other women in the same boat. I just hope that I can find someone to have the boys for me on a Tuesday morning! Any takers please?

Huge blog which I didn't really want to start but once I got going I couldn't stop! Definitely have preggers brain though as I sent a Christmas card to my sister with the name of her dog that she had put down a year ago on it and I tried to put Leo's slipper on his hand today! Very funny.

Off to chill for 2 minutes before going to bed. Doesn't make sense I know.

HEARTBEAT - 17 WEEKS, 4 DAYS

I have to rewind slightly as I realised I haven't posted the video of when we heard the heartbeat.

The appointment was on Friday 30th September and Leo, Ellis and Rob came along too. It was really nice being there as a family.

I had my blood pressure done and I was told that I didn't need to give any blood as I had had an Oscar scan so the blood screening wasn't necessary. Then I laid on the bed and after a few seconds we heard the little squishy noise of Nugget's heart.

Last night I'm pretty sure I felt some movement. It was more like a kick actually but I haven't felt anything yet today. Rubbish!

Went to my physio appointment yesterday. She was really pleased with my muscle tone and said they were very strong but that the split in my tummy muscles would happen again and that we just needed to keep an eye on it. I have my exercises to do and for now I don't have to wear my stretchy bandage. If I have any pain I have to put it on and book an earlier appointment. My next appointment is the end of November when I am 25 weeks. By then my uterus will be pushing up past my belly button which is where the stretch is measured from. She was quite pleased though which made me happy.

Okay then so here are the 16 week bump picture. Take into account that Ellis took the bump picture this time.

I have also put my current measurements and what I was last time. The "from Leo" means an increase or decrease from the same stage as Leo pregnancy.

This time...

Weight = 12st 4lbs (+8lbs from Leo) (+9lbs this pregnancy) SHIT!

Tummy = 93.5cm (+2.5cm from Leo)
Upper arm = 29cm (+2cm from Leo)
Upper leg = 61cm (+2cm from Leo)
Ankle = 24cm (.5cm from Leo)
Neck = 34cm (1.5cm from Leo

Leo Pregnancy...

Weight = 11st 10lb (+4lbs)

Tummy = 91cm (+6cm)
Upper arm = 27cm
Upper leg = 59cm (+2cm)
Ankle = 23.5cm
Neck = 32.5cm

I'm not worried about the increased measurements. My starting weight was a lot higher than second time around and I didn't control my eating for the first 4 months this time either so I'm not surprised. My appetite has diminished in recent days and I'm starting to eat healthier. Better late than never I suppose.

Hoping to feel more movements in the next few days. Will post an entry if I do.

4 MONTHS - 16 WEEKS

I told a lady today that I was 3 months pregnant. It then occurred to me that I'm 4 months gone! It is going by so quickly! Much quicker than the first 2.

I'm feeling fine, waking up with a bump now rather than a flabby belly but I can still lie on my stomach. I love having a bump and can't wait until it obvious that I'm carrying a baby in there and not just a few extra packet of crisps. Will need to do a bit of shopping though as all maternity clothes are summer stuff. Thin cotton t-shirts/vests and one pair of broken jeans.

Boobs are getting bigger and fuller which is great! I hate the saggy things I've been left with, but I can't stay pregnant forever. They do sting every now and then and I just put it down to a growing day.

Still really spotty. Most days I have new spots on my face. Don't seem to be getting them anywhere else.

Hair is staying cleaner for longer which is great as the other day I couldn't remember when I last washed it! How horrible is that.

I have my appointment with the physio soon but pelvis is so far, okay. Hope she says my tummy muscles are doing good too. I'm doing my exercises all the time.

I've just read back over my growing dollop diary and I was feeling Leo move at this stage. I'm certainly not feeling anything at the moment but will have a lie down in a bit and concentrate to see if I can feel it. I definitely felt flutters the other night but nothing much.

I will try and do my measurements tomorrow, in the morning. I know for sure I am over the weight by about 5lbs, but then again I started out at least 2lb heavier this time around.

I keep forgetting all the time! I was chucking Leo up and down this evening, which he loves by the way, but then I realised that I probably shouldn't be doing that. Also I play fight with the boys and we roll around the floor and they jump on me etc.. Very silly of me and I need to be careful.

Had a stressful few days. Been living up Mum and Dad's as the electricians were doing some work and making lots of mess. Rob was away working too so been feeling a bit alone, even though I wasn't of course. Mum and Dad were great. Dad slept on the floor and Ellis and I had his bed, and Mum gave up her getting ready room for Leo to sleep in and of course the boys are up early every morning. They were brill to just put us up like that, at such short notice too. Thank you so much xxx

My 16 week bump picture was taken by Ellis this week as Rob is away until Wednesday night so that will be too late really. I set the camera up on the tripod and he pressed the button. It didn't work that well really but I was just doing it quickly.

Pictures and figures to follow tomorrow as too tired today.

HOW BIG?

Oh my God I'm huge! I seriously don't think I can get away with this for much longer. I can't get over how big I've got, and how quickly.

Boobs are slightly bigger too which is great as I hate the saggy things I had before.

Hopefully the scan will go well, we can tell the folks on Saturday and then I can tell everyone. Not really sure how to tell my Mummy friends. I really wanted to tell them all together but pretty sure I wont be able to. The next evening together isn't until I'm about 16 weeks, when I will look about 8 months pregnant by then.

We have now moved house, and it was pretty hard work. I'm sure I was lifting stuff that was too heavy. I am glad no one knew at the time of the move as they would have been faffing over me I'm sure.

Looking forward to telling the boys. Leo won't have any clue but Ellis is going to love it. He is always saying he wants another baby brother.

Can't stop thinking about the scan. Hopefully post the pics on the weekend.

CHECKING IN

Apart from the ever expanding waist line, being pissy, tired and groggy all the time, I'm not really having any symptoms!

The weight is going on big time! My whole mental attitude towards food and eating changes drastically as soon as I receive that positive test result. I switch from diet coke to full fat, I buy full fat micro meals, crisp intake increases, I start to eat chocolate and actually look forward to having a dessert, I eat sweets, finish off the kids food and just generally eat a hell of a lot more than I normally do. No wonder I'm going to pack on the pounds! It's strange cause I get sad about getting too big but I don't do anything about it.

Touch wood, no pelvis issues yet, which is a good sign.

I had my checking in appointment with Judith last Tuesday and I now have my orange book! It was such a long appointment. I had left Ellis with my Mummy friends at the soft play and told them I was going across the road for a doctors appointment at 3:30. I left at 3:10 and didn't return until 4:40pm!! I had sent them a couple of text messages saying that the doctors were running late etc so I think they bought it. Time will tell.

The appointment went ok. Leo was screaching for most of it. The bloody student kept faffing with the computer and it just took forever! They had 3 attempts to take my blood too. I told the student where the vein was and where the best place was to insert the needle but she did it about 2cms too low. Then Judith had a go and she was too far left so eventually they listened to me and got it. Good job I don't care about needles.

Judith mentioned the previous c-section and the fact that I will never forgive them or let them forget how they messed up with Ellis, and she is right.

I made a fuss about being in a normal room at the hospital and Judith booked me into the Birthing Suite to see if we could get away with it.

I asked to be referred to the Physio lady again as I want to get a head start on the stomach muscle issue but she said I had to attend a class at the surgery first before I could be referred. Again I kicked up a fuss and said that the lady knows me, I saw her during pregnancy and for 6 months after so I'm pretty sure me attending an hour class telling me what exercises I need to do isn't actually going to help me. She backed down and said she would refer me. Good job I know what I'm talking about and I don't mind speaking up and asking for it.

I told her we were moving house and she said that I could stay with her or move to Marcia. I really would like to have Marcia because I like her but Judith knows me, and knows what I want and how much I want it. I think it may be best to stick with her as much as it pains me to admit that. Must give it some more thought. I have time, my next appointment isn't until the end of Sept.

Received my scan date letter today which isn't until 7th Sept! I can't wait another 3 + weeks to tell my folks. Hopefully going to get an Oscar scan booked in before that but with the house move on the 27th, not sure how we can fit it all in.

Struggling a bit at the moment. Boys are playing up, a lot, and it's really taking its toll on me. I just can't seem to cope with it at the moment. Hopefully things will get better once the move has been done and Ellis is settled back into going to pre-school. It will give me a little bit of a break too.

Going to be needing a lot of child care over the coming months. I hope my friends don't desert me as I really need them right now.

TARGET

Due to the fact that I have been unwell I haven't been eating properly and I lost a few pounds. This morning I got on the scales and I was at target weight of 11st 7lbs. Strangely I wasn't all that pleased as I have now started eating again and I know it will all go on again and I'll be 12st again before I know it. It's up to me I know but I just don't have the will power at the moment.

Boobs still stinging quite a bit. Not my whole boob but just mainly the nipple. I think it's just because my milk is finally drying up and nothing else.

Due on next week ish. My cycle is all over the place, which I'm not used to so I suppose I just wait and wait.

THANK GOD!

Period now finished thank God. It was a horrible one. Hopefully I'm all cleared out and ready to have a baby in there now. Just need to get on with it I suppose. Working out any type of cycle is just going to be impossible so I might do the temperature thing and just keep an eye on my discharge.

On Thursday I saw Mum and she did her usual question of "not having any more?" and I had to really talk it up that I was going to get rid of the stuff etc. and that I was happy just being the 2 boys and that things were easier now and that I was just going to get on with living and not creating more life. I don't want to lie to her but I would like her to have a nice surprise.

I so want to tell everyone!

Feeling really down about my body size/shape. Need to just bite the bullet and get on with my diet and exercise now! I'm just finding it so hard. I'll get there in the end.

Still not sleeping well, not sure why really but it is really effecting me. Hopefully get a good night tonight but I doubt it as it is already quite late and I have to wait for Rob to get home from my Mum and Dad's to let him in.

Fingers crossed that this is the month. Will be tricky to hide if we do as I have a hen weekend and 3 weddings to get through but I could do it.

WET BLANKET

I was still in doubt until this morning! Period has officially arrived and it is horrid. Very painful and heavy almost immediately. Something was definitely odd this month but ah well. I've sort of stopped doing my head in about it. Well every now and then anyway.

Last night I was still thinking there could be a possibility, even after I saw a little bit of bright pink blood when I went to the loo. Could have just been some spotting? Well I am without doubt today and I'm pissy as hell!

Had a rough start really. Kids were playing up to my bad mood which always makes things that much worse. Ellis is in pre-school now and Leo is in bed so I'm having a sit down to write this. Then I'm going to go and scrub the windows I think.

I now have more time to sort out my eating and exercise and do measurements and weight etc

I really should stop complaining. I've had it easy in the past compaired to some and I do have 2 healthy, happy boys. I sound like such a wet blanket. SNAP OUT OF IT!

Rob has been really good about it. He has been giving me cuddles and phoned me a minute ago to ask how I was doing, which was nice.

I have now realised that I am unable to be relaxed and not worry, and not count days, and not find out when I'm ovulating etc. It just isn't possible for me and I clearly won't be able to relax until I see a little heart beat on the 12 week scan! NUTS!

I'm so excited about adding to our brood. I wasn't sure I was ready but I am now. I've done a lot of thinking over the last couple weeks and I can't wait to have another baby. I may have to though.

DENIAL

I wonder how long I can leave it before doing a test?! How long can I keep denying it!? I really can't believe it if I am. It's crazy. One quicky at the end of my cycle and duddah!

Obviously that would be amazing and I am truly blessed to be able to get pregnant just like that when I know so many others struggle. I read a lot of infertility blogs and I really feel for them. I sort of understand why they feel so guilty now when they do get pregnant and get scared of announcing it so as not to upset their fellow blog readers. It's a tricky one.

I was thinking in the shower last night (which is where I do the most thinking) and I was suddenly feeling really guilty. I felt sorry for Ellis and Leo. They will have to share Mummy even more and I felt like I missed a bit of Ellis growing up when Leo was born as I was struggling to cope with a new baby. I don't want to miss a moment of them growing up! What will be different this time? It will be hard but I think it wont be as big a shock as going from one to two. With Rob still being away 3 nights a week will make things that bit harder and we still haven't found a house we like. There is just nothing coming on! I'm sure it will all work out.

I weighed this morning. Not happy at all. I was 11st 12lbs. 5lbs over my target weight! Rob has set up running machine now so hopefully will start on that soon.

CRAPPY

Feeling really horrid. Gut ache and just generally feeling sick. Didn't get much sleep last night so that wouldn't help. I really thought I could be relaxed about the whole thing third time around but I just can't stop thinking about it all.

I'm not happy about my body right now. Rather than doing something about it though, I just ate cake! I'm an idiot.

MIGHT BE?

I might be pregnant! How crazy is that! Basically we started trying for Nugget earlier than originally planned. I just thought I'm right at the end of my cycle, what are the chances!? I suppose it only takes one time. Time will tell. Very excited if I am.

I haven't taken a 0 week picture for a few reasons. Obviously we have already started trying and I haven't taken one yet but I will do. I'm just really disappointed in myself. I haven't got rid of my baby weight from Leo yet which I'm not happy about. I know it's down to me to do and I did get within 3/4 lbs of my target weight but then I just put it all back on. Still have 1/2 a stone to go to target weight. I wanted to do measurements like last time as a comparison but I'm not sure I want to see the differences.

I finished feeding Leo a while ago now and my milk has dried up which is strange as they have been leaking since I first got pregnant with Ellis in 2006! My boobs aren't what they once were and I don't like them but Rob does so that's good. They are still the same size but certainly not the same shape.

My biggest worry is the size of my flabby belly. Fat and skin. And the skin is horrible as it is covered in stretch marks. Not a pleasant sight and I suppose I should try and get used to it.

Really looking forward to being pregnant again and who knows in 2 weeks time I might be! I really don't think so though. I don't think I'm going to bother working out my ovulation dates and stuff this time. I might just leave it to fate. See what happens. I don't want to be living my life by a monthly cycle and getting my hopes up all the time. I also don't want my thoughts taken over with am I or aren't I etc.

Most people will be surprised I think although those closest to me probably won't be. Charlotte hasn't been convinced by my crappy lies about not having any more babies and there are quite a few people that know we are going for a 3rd. Most of the AB girls know, my yoga lot and Caroline. That's quite a lot really. I won't tell them I'm actually pregnant though until I've told family and a few other important people in my life.

I keep thinking I would like to do things different this time. Not calculating my ovulation dates is one already, not telling anyone is different too. Also I thought I might do the test on my own and then tell Rob in a nice way, some how. Or I might not tell anyone and just wait for bump to tell everyone. I wonder how far along I could get before anyone asks? Not long with a gut my size already.

My last period came and went with no problems. It wasn't heavy or that painful which was good.

I was starting to get a bit impatient with waiting until the end of May but now that we have brought it forward a bit I'm okay. I think due date if we were successful this month would be early February. Not sure and I'm not going to be doing that every month either. Plus I have loads of events and things coming up this summer that I will need to make sure if I'm pregnant or not before I go. I have a hen weekend, a pre hen night, 2 weddings etc etc.

Today I went shopping and I bought a dress for the weddings! I'm really stupid as I might not be fitting them in 2 months time so I'm going to have to take them back and going shopping nearer the time.

It's all good though and I'm feeling rather positive about it all. Yes it will be very hard, extremely hard even, but I think the shock of going from 1-2 kids is going to be far greater than just adding to the bunch. Bring it on!

PERIOD FINISHED

I weighed tonight, after dinner and I was 11st 13lb so hopefully in the morning I'll be less than that. The diet is going really well apart from today as I have eaten loads of Easter egg, but generally speaking I am finding it easier. I don't think about it all day and I'm not eating stuff just for the sake of it. I'm pleased about that as now I know my weight will steadily start to go down and I will feel happier about it.

My first period has now finished. The first 3 days were horrible but after that it was fine. Not looking forward to the next one.

I said to Rob today, "should we just start this month?", I was only kidding though as my due date if we were successful would be 2nd January 2011 and I think that is way too close to Christmas.

I really can't wait to be pregnant again, and to go through that whole experience. I hope everything runs smoothly. Of course I am worried about coping with 3 but I'm sure it will be fine. Ellis will be that bit older and will be going to pre-school at least 3 days a week and depending on when baby is born, Leo will be in pre-school not long after etc. I think it will be fine, hard, but fine.

1ST PERIOD

I have been thinking about doing this entry for days. I have so much I want to note down but feel that it might go on a bit too long.

Recently Leo has been playing up while I have been trying to feed him so I decided to stop feeding him. I didn't feed him for one day, and the following morning my period started. It's horrid! I forgot! I haven't had one since August 2008. The period arriving is also a good thing as I can work out my cycle now.

Since starting my period my appetite has diminished but I am still 12st. I have been eating a lot better recently so I will hopefully keep up the good work and get my weight down a bit. The main thing is I really need to be doing some exercise. I just can't find the extra energy to do it. I sort of have the motivation. I mean getting pregnant again should be a big kick up the bum, but actually I just think, well I'm going to get big again anyway. Plus I still don't think it has really hit me that we are going to be doing it all again.

My body right now disgusts me. I'm fat and flabby, with horrible stretch marks and a big bag of skin. After having Ellis it wasn't like this. I think the fact that I had a previous c-section which I'm sure affected my stomach muscles, which made me have diastasis recti, has made the left over baby bump that much more flabby. I really need to move my fat dimply arse and get fit, and soon.

A funny story about my folic acid. I keep it on top of the unit in the en-suite, and the other day my Mum went looking around the house for some pain killers and she found some on top of the unit. She must have seen the packet and box but I'm not sure she would have put 2 and 2 together. She didn't say anything to me either which I am sure she would have if she thought I was thinking of getting pregnant again.

A few people know about baby number 3, one of them being Sophie who I met in my active birthing group with Leo. It is really nice to be able to chat about it all with someone. She was over last Friday and we had a good old natter about it and I was getting quite excited about it again.

I'm sure most of my friends will think I'm totally mental, and I think I may be for at least the first few years but in the long run it will be wicked. It will be tough going but worth it all.

I have already been thinking ahead to coming events to see how I may have to get around them. Like parties and hen do's, wedding etc etc. In recent months I've been drinking so it will be quite tricky to suddenly not be. We will see. Rob and I certainly aren't in a rush to get pregnant this time so it could take a while longer than the last 2 times. With Rob being away it will likely take longer anyway.

Right I'll stop now. I kept it very brief and not really from the heart as there was a lot more I wanted to express but it doesn't matter.

NO PILL

The first day of not taking my pill. It feels strange. I keep seeing the packet in the window and go to take it and then realise that I'm not any more and that I will soon be trying for a baby. Very strange.

Leo had his first bottle of formula feed today. I had to warm it up but he done in 4oz and then I topped him up. He did really well seeing as he hasn't had a bottle for ages and has never had formula before. Not sure if I will do the afternoon feed in a bottle or not yet. I have an hour to decide.

I weighed this morning and I am still 12st. I'm not worried, I'm eating okay and as soon as my finger feels better I will do some exercise. I think stopping breastfeeding will also help, it did last time anyway.

The only people who know for sure that Rob and I are going to try for another baby are my yoga girls. I tell them everything and they are a pretty good sounding board, if that is the right phrase. There is the potential that 3 of us may be pregnant at the same time again which will be wicked.

I was sorting out the washing yesterday and there was loads! I said to Rob "imagine what it will be like when the next one is here!". It didn't feel weird at all, quite natural in fact. I will also need another clothes horse!

Another thing happened yesterday, we were on our way home from Rob's Mum's after having had lunch there and I said to him that I was stopping the pill tomorrow and he said why! That man loves to wind people up, mainly me. He smiled and I said you still up for it and have we agreed, to which he replied yes we have agreed. I'm sure he wouldn't any way, but I wouldn't want him to have more children just because of me. I think he would have certainly put up a fight if he wasn't sure etc. I really don't want to have that argument in the future when I'm moaning about how hard it is for him to then say, "well it was you that wanted another one!".

AGREED

Well it has been talked about and agreed to try for another baby. It's so exciting and I don't feel scared at all. I'm sure I will when and if the time comes. Basically I asked Rob to read my last entry and then said, well? He said he was still up for it.

So today I took my last pill for hopefully a very long time. I have 3 months to get fitter, loose the rest of the baby weight and take folic acid, which reminds me that I need to buy some.

I have broken my finger at the moment so it may be a bit hard to get too physical with any type of fitness but I will start soon.

I'm also going to start weaning Leo on to a bottle tomorrow so that I can get my periods back and start working out my cycle.

It may take us a bit longer than last time because Rob is away during the week. 4 nights a week, and not in a row, may make conceiving a bit trickier, but time will tell

I've still been putting people off the idea that we will have any more and I find people's responses quite funny. Some blatantly don't believe me, others say they think I would be stupid to have any more because of Rob being away etc, some think 2 is enough, and loads more.

I know life will be crazy hard for a few years but I just think about what it will be like when they are all a bit older. I can't wait for crazy Christmas and birthday parties, great family holidays etc etc.

Pregnancy certainly takes its toll on my body and I'm really not looking forward to all the aches and pains that come along with carrying a baby. I will get through it though. I can't wait to feel the baby move and to see what it looks like when it arrives.

Trying very hard to keep this diary brief for now.