SICKY BAD - 38 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

I'm ill. I'm feeling very sorry for myself and very worried about going through major surgery feeling like this. My head and ears are pounding, nose is blocked and I keep coughing. I can only imagine the pain I will feel when I cough with stitches running across my belly.

I'm trying to spend my days bonding with baby. Picturing his little face, hands, feet etc and thinking of a name for him. I haven't come up with any yet. I just want to get him here safe and well. I'm a bit worried about his feet and hips but nothing I can do about that yet. Hips will be scanned like Ellis' were and the feet are still moving so hopefully they haven't been squished.

Bump is still wriggling but not moving as such, and never really has done.

Rob is ill too but he is doing his best to look after us all. It must be hard going to be working so far away and then to come home feeling rough and wanting to chill when you have other sick people and hectic kids to contend with. Ellis is really on one today!

Stacey had her baby boy yesterday. He is a little cutie at 5lb 12oz. They named him Leo Charles.

Very teary at the moment but that's because I'm feeling so rough and I HATE being ill, especially when there is stuff that needs to be done and a huge event coming up like having a baby to look after! It's not just the new baby either, I need to make sure my boys are all okay with it too. Need to make a list of final stuff that needs to be done. I want to sort my hospital bags out again as I don't need them set up for going through labour and to just check I'm happy with everything really.

I'm just really worried and scared about everything at the moment. Don't feel like I'm coping too well. Just need some positive thoughts to snap out of it.

4D SCAN - 27 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

Today was the day of our 4D scan. I was pretty nervous and excited and not really sure what to expect.

The Mum's arrived and we said our goodbyes to the boys before getting in the new car to head to the appointment.

We left in plenty of time but we arrived at the clinic on time, not early. It didn't matter though as we didn't get called in until 4pm and our appointment was at 3:45pm. I do understand now though why we were a little late. I'll explain in a bit.

I had had a can of fizzy and a couple of chocolate bars to get the baby moving as this was what I was instructed to do. I had a full bladder too which isn't essential but if the baby is in a funny position, then going for a wee might help it to move.

We did the formalities of signing the declaration etc and then I hopped on the bed and warm gel was applied to my huge tummy. It was warm because it had been on the radiator.

They lady that did the scan was Natalie and she is actually a friend of Tilly's which was a bit strange to find out as she really wanted to ask me about it at the start of the session but we didn't find out until the end.

The first part was doing the usual 2D scan of just checking around, the sex of the baby (clearly still a boy) and its general health and position. Guess what? The baby is breech! I know there is plenty of time for it to move around and I so hope it does but in my gut I really think it won't. Time will tell on that, and like Sally said, at least I could blag another scan later on.

We did get a DVD of the whole thing and there is a part on there pointing out the fact that he is indeed a he. When I work out how to put it on here, I will. But I'm sure that will be after Christmas now unless I can get Rob to help me with it.

We then started to look at the 4D images. It didn't work how I thought it would. I assumed it would be the same as a normal scan but seeing it properly if you know what I mean. But what actually happens is, they find the face on the 2D image and then flick a switch, wait for it to work for a little bit and then you see what you get. A lot of the time there is a lot of black holes, which is where there is cord, hands, arms, and in our babies case, legs and feet! Yep his feet were up over his head, just like Ellis'.

We tried for a while to get something and I had to roll over onto my right side, then onto my left side, then back to my back but we still weren't getting any good face pictures. Natalie then said to go to the toilet, walk around, get a drink, jump up and down etc and come back in 15 minutes. This 15 minutes is why we were late going in as the girl before us had the same issue and had to go back to try again. We were very lucky with this and I will explain why again later on.

I went to the loo then went outside for a walk. I managed to grab Rob who was buying coffee for the Mum's and he bought me a tea. Hot tea always gets Nugget moving. I walked around a little bit more and then we went back in.

It wasn't fantastic but it was better than before. We managed to get a few good pictures.

I love this one!

Hand and foot in front of face. We could see his fingers and toes wiggle.

Here are some short videos of the scan too.

There was a really funny moment towards the end where we were watching his hand in front of his face and it looked like he was counting as he had a hand and foot there and Rob said he had got to 10 and needed to carry on. Then we said about him telling us to get lost and that we wouldn't be surprised if he gave us the finger. Seconds later he did! We all laughed, even the sonographer who apologised for doing so. I told her not to be silly and that of course she could laugh. Bless.

We were in there for ages and at the end when she said she was all done, she asked if I was happy and I said yes but could you please do it for 10 seconds more? Cheeky I know but I knew we were her last appointment and I just wanted one more glimpse of his chubby chops.

The Mums and Rob enjoyed it and we all agreed that it looked a lot like Ellis. There were times, especially from the side angle that it looked a bit like Leo but with the full lips, chubby nose and cheeks, I think it looked just like my first born. I hope the delivery doesn't end up the same though. I can't help myself freeking out about it a bit and I have already started to read up on ways to get the baby shifting. This one web site suggested these things!

1. Visualizing the baby moving down with the head very deep in your pelvis, several times a day; especially in conjunction with positions and exercises below.
2. Swimming as often as possible. This keeps your body and pelvis loose and relaxed. Do in conjunction with headstand below if you have help.
3. Headstand - with assistance and in a pool frequently as possible.
4. Breech Tilt - begin at 32-35 weeks gestation. Do 3 times daily for 10-15 minutes each time, when you have an empty stomach, and the baby is active. Prop one end of an ironing board securely on a sofa or chair 12 to 18 inches high (or may use slant board). Lie down, bend knees but keep feet flat on board. Relax, breathe deeply, avoid tensing. May also use pillows on a flat surface to raise hips 12-18" above shoulders. Gravity pushes the baby's head into the fundus, tucks it, and baby can then do a somersault to a vertex position.
5. CD/iPod headphones - place them inside mom's pants toward her pubic bone and play classical music for 10 minutes 6-8 times a day.
6. Flashlight - try moving slowly down from the top of the uterus toward your pubic bone while you are in a breech tilt position.
7. Massage - start with your left hand at the bottom of the abdomen and your right hand just above it. Move move your hands clockwise around the right side of your tummy. As your right hand reaches the top of your abdomen, slide the left one over your right and move it down the left side of your tummy. Your left hand leads as you you come full circle, continuing clockwise. Massage gently as you would to apply lotion. Massage for ten minutes or more up to several times each day.
8. Clothespin - place on the small toe of each foot at the outside corner of the toenail; sideways so that the toenail and toepad are stimulated for 30 minutes per day, this is an acupressure point that is a "moving down" point. You can also do this with just finger pressure as you remember to do it.
9. Motion Sickness band - place with the bead four fingerwidths above the inner ankle bone - another acupressure point that is used for stimulation of the uterus. Do not use this point if you are experiencing any pre-term labor.
10. Glass of orange or other juice - follow this with a side-lying position with your hips positioned higher than your feet. Babies move more after a sugar high!
11. Pelvic Tilt- with an ice pack on the top of your tummy on an empty stomach, 10 minutes twice a day. Do this while lying on your back on the floor with knees flexed and feet on the floor with three large pillows placed under your buttocks. Try this in conjunction with headphones and visualization.
12. Cat stretch - start with all fours, then lay your head and chest flat on the floor with your buttocks in the air, as you round your back and return to all fours.
13. Knee-chest position - by kneeling with hips flexed slightly more than 90 degree, but with thighs not pressing against your tummy and your head, shoulders and upper chest are flat on a mattress for 15 minutes every two waking hours for five days.
14. Belly Relaxing followed by Inversion - Partner places a shawl, sheet, towel or rebozo under mom's hips as she lays on the floor. Lift up on the corners of the cloth and shimmy her from side to side moving your hands up and down to wiggle her belly from side to side. These should be very small movements which mom should find very relaxing. Do this for about 5 minutes. Then mother kneels on the stairway landing. Walk your hands down 2 or 3 stairs into an all fours position; have your partner support your shoulders to balance you. Remain in this position for about 5-10 minutes or as long as comfortable. Also do this on an empty stomach.
The following techniques to turn breech babies to vertex involve the assistance of a specialist or medical professional:
15. Acupuncture - find a acupuncturist who is familiar with pregnancy and knows the points to stimulate for turning a breech baby.
16. Webster's Breech Technique - see a Chiropractor who is experienced in this technique.
17. External Version - this can be done in the hospital at about 37 weeks; see an Ob-Gyn for assistance and more information.

I'm just really hoping it doesn't come to any of that, but I suppose I ought to be prepared. I need to stop getting myself worked up about it for now as like everyone says there is plenty of time for it to turn. Just want to cry though. I'll snap out of it, just a bit tired from all the excitement.

We had to wait for the photos, CD and DVD before Rob brought the car to the door for us to go home.

The Mums watched a repeat of the DVD in the back of our new car on the way home, which was pretty cool.

At home we tried to talk to Ellis about it but he was too interested in the ipad. Will try again tomorrow.

Hands and feet are puffy again tonight. Looks like that might be here to stay until the end. I'm going to be massive just like I was with Ellis. Ah well.

I'm off to do some handstands!

TECHNOLOGY - 27 WEEKS, 2 DAYS

Still haven't managed to work out how to put the videos on yet but will have another go on Friday when Rob is home to help me with stupid technology!

Nipples have started to sting in the last couple of days so I'm expecting them to start leaking soon.

Pain in leg is still there but I've been trying to ignore it and just getting on with it. It does feel quite muscular but was wondering if it could be a sign of a blood clot or something. I haven't checked for swelling which I suppose I should but leg colour seems fine so I'm sure its not. Sally's sister suffered really badly with a blood clot so its been brought to my attention recently. I wouldn't have given it a thought if it wasn't for that. Thankfully she is doing much better and last blood test was normal levels I believe, so YAY!

Rob keeps coming home from work, putting his hand on bump and going ah, I love it. It's so nice of him to do that and I know he isn't putting it on as such. It is a genuine feeling and it makes me feel nice as I feel like I don't particularly look nice. Every time I glance in a mirror, I never look properly, I see someone with a puffy white face, bags and just generally looking awful.

Nugget is still moving tons which is lush. Wish I could bottle the sensation and feelings you have when you feel it as the memories of this part seem to go very quickly. In fact its the biggest thing you miss when baby is out yet you can't remember what it feels like. Very strange.

Ellis rested his hand on my tummy earlier and left it there for a while which was nice. He didn't feel him move even though he did right under his hand, like father like son! I also showed him some newborn sized clothes in Sainsbury's today so that he could get some idea of how small he will be when he gets here.

Right off to do the other blog as I'm behind, again!

HAPPY HAPPY - 21 WEEKS, 1 DAY

This pregnancy is turning out to be quite different from the first 2, although I'm still sure it will be a boy.

I haven't had pelvis pain yet which is great and I'm really enjoying this pregnancy, not that I didn't the other 2 but they were just a lot harder, and I cried more feeling sorry for myself as it was just hurting so much all the time. I hope the lack of pain continues even though the stiffness and sharp stabbing pain in my arse cheek have arrived. I think that is do with the sciatic nerve.

Things are really busy at the moment and I'm pretty sure that will continue until after Christmas now, which is great but also I feel like I'm not giving enough thought to this pregnancy and this baby. I keep forgetting! How could I? I even tried laying on my tummy this evening while chatting to Ellis, and it wasn't until it hurt that I realised I'm squashing my lickle Nugget!

Speaking of Ellis, that is another thing that is making this pregnancy so great. He is so excited too! I'm getting to share it all with him, and he understands this time. Tonight he felt it kick for the first time and was so pleased. He was very gentle and really interested in what was going on. It's really nice talking to him about it all and I love it.

The movements are still really faint actually and really, really low down. I don't remember the kicking with the boys being so far down, like under my c-section scar. I've seen it kicking from the outside but right down low. I assume that is ok!?

Last time at this stage too, my scar was burning. This time I haven't had any problems with it which has been good. Probably because all the scar tissue was stretched with the Leo pregnancy.

Looking forward to the scan on Friday. Be good to see Nugget again and check that everything is proceeding how it should. I'm still not 100% on finding out the sex or not. I suppose it depends on if everything is ok first. Rob really wants to find out and I would like to, but I also want to feel how it feels when you find out at the end. I just can't decide completely.

Bump has suddenly really popped out! I'm wearing my one pair of fat jeans everyday now and they really could do with a wash but I have nothing else. I've bought some leggings but can't bring myself to put my tree trunks in them. I've also bought some jeans but they just pull my pants down every time I move. I hate not having nice fitting clothes. I buy stuff hoping it will fit properly later but never wear it! I do the same with the boys. I buy them clothes that I think they will grow into but then I forget I have them and by the time I remember they don't fit again! I'm all confused over clothes at the moment but I'll work something out. Would really just like one pair of decent fitting jeans!

I had a fair few people today tell me how big bump was suddenly looking. I think the fact that I haven't pooed in a few days and that they didn't see me for a week because of half term has made a difference.

Busting out of my bras. Lotty has leant me some so I need to try them on. If not I'm off to Perfect Fit to get some new ones. Going to treat myself.

Nervous about scan. Hopefully have some blurry pictures to post on the weekend. I say it like that because they seem to do crap 20 week pictures. I looked at Ellis' yesterday and his were brilliant (we were at a different hospital for Ellis scans). You can see them below.

Leo's were rubbish, in my opinion. They were £2 each too. This time they are £4 each! Not sure how many we will buy yet. You have to decide before you actually see the pictures so you could end up with 4 pictures of next to nothing.

Right, that's it! I'm shattered so off to bed for some rest before Ellis comes in saying he can't sleep. I really can't be bothered tonight so if he comes in, he can stay even though he just bugs me rather than going back to sleep.

4 MONTHS - 16 WEEKS

I told a lady today that I was 3 months pregnant. It then occurred to me that I'm 4 months gone! It is going by so quickly! Much quicker than the first 2.

I'm feeling fine, waking up with a bump now rather than a flabby belly but I can still lie on my stomach. I love having a bump and can't wait until it obvious that I'm carrying a baby in there and not just a few extra packet of crisps. Will need to do a bit of shopping though as all maternity clothes are summer stuff. Thin cotton t-shirts/vests and one pair of broken jeans.

Boobs are getting bigger and fuller which is great! I hate the saggy things I've been left with, but I can't stay pregnant forever. They do sting every now and then and I just put it down to a growing day.

Still really spotty. Most days I have new spots on my face. Don't seem to be getting them anywhere else.

Hair is staying cleaner for longer which is great as the other day I couldn't remember when I last washed it! How horrible is that.

I have my appointment with the physio soon but pelvis is so far, okay. Hope she says my tummy muscles are doing good too. I'm doing my exercises all the time.

I've just read back over my growing dollop diary and I was feeling Leo move at this stage. I'm certainly not feeling anything at the moment but will have a lie down in a bit and concentrate to see if I can feel it. I definitely felt flutters the other night but nothing much.

I will try and do my measurements tomorrow, in the morning. I know for sure I am over the weight by about 5lbs, but then again I started out at least 2lb heavier this time around.

I keep forgetting all the time! I was chucking Leo up and down this evening, which he loves by the way, but then I realised that I probably shouldn't be doing that. Also I play fight with the boys and we roll around the floor and they jump on me etc.. Very silly of me and I need to be careful.

Had a stressful few days. Been living up Mum and Dad's as the electricians were doing some work and making lots of mess. Rob was away working too so been feeling a bit alone, even though I wasn't of course. Mum and Dad were great. Dad slept on the floor and Ellis and I had his bed, and Mum gave up her getting ready room for Leo to sleep in and of course the boys are up early every morning. They were brill to just put us up like that, at such short notice too. Thank you so much xxx

My 16 week bump picture was taken by Ellis this week as Rob is away until Wednesday night so that will be too late really. I set the camera up on the tripod and he pressed the button. It didn't work that well really but I was just doing it quickly.

Pictures and figures to follow tomorrow as too tired today.

OSCAR SCAN - 12 WEEKS 4 DAYS

What a very, very exciting day! Naomi came over this morning and I was going to tell her about Nugget when she produced a scan picture of her own little baby! I am so happy for her! I thought she might have been after a few things that were said/not said and done etc but obviously not 100%. I am 5 days behind her. How cool is that.

After congratulating her I told her I was too! She was so pleased and we chatted for ages about it all and she genuinely seems excited about going through it all at the same time together. I discussed AB classes and she is interested in attending so that will be even better.

She thinks she is having a girl but I am so sure it is a boy. Of course I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure I won't.

This afternoon Rob and I dropped the kids off with Saskia and Rory and went to the hospital for the Oscar scan. I went in to have some blood taken and then we walked over to Jaidan and Leighton's house for a cuppa and a chat before going back for the scan. The doctor was running late so we had to wait for a bit and then when we did go in it was a bit rushed. Good but done in a hurry.

I was really, really nervous that there would be nothing there, or something there but no heart beat. The picture came on the screen and I could see the sack but no baby, then there was a very big babies head on the screen as it was really zoomed in. He quickly zoomed out and I instantly saw a little heart fluttering away. The baby was moving a lot and the picture on the screen was really clear. The pictures didn't come out as well though, which is a shame.

He showed us all the important bits and then said we could listen to the heart. I wasn't expecting that so was pleasantly surprised. It was the sweetest sound.

I left the room so happy! I still can't quite believe it and I even said to the doctor I don't believe it.

Rob came out the room and said, "I'm worried about my foot". Typical bloke! He was well happy though and just as relived as me that everything was okay.

I have my dating scan and consultant meeting on Tuesday and Rob was going to take the day off work to come with me but there really isn't any need for him to come again. I would like Mum to come with me but I'm not sure who else can watch the boys. I'll think of something.

Just want to tell everyone now but would like to do it face to face as it's lush to see peoples responses. Sally suspects for some reason so she won't be too surprised and I think my Dad may be suspicious, but that's just his nature.

Will post new pics and scan pics once the PC has been set up again.

We told Ellis when we got home and showed him the pictures. We asked him to guess what the pictures were. First was a cat, then a dog, an owl and 4 foxes. We explained to him what it was, where it was etc and that Mummy's tummy was going to get big and I would go to hospital and come home with another baby. He was totally fine with it and said he wanted a baby sister. We asked him what he thought and he said, "i see, Daddy put the telly back on". Funny bugger.

I can't stop thinking about it now. Looking forward to the next few days.