HEAVY - 3 WEEKS, 6 DAYS OLD

The last few nights I've been tying to get Oscar to settle in his own bed. The first night which was Monday worked out really really well. He had a bath with the big boys, had a big feed after story time then went in his crib for the first time and stayed there! He didn't wake for ages and I fed him around 10ish and then just before midnight and on both occasions he went back down in his bed.

Then last night I tried to do a similar thing but it just didn't work out. He didn't end up being settled in bed until 10pm and then tonight he had a bath with his big brothers, had a feed and I tried to put him down but he wasn't having any of it. 2 nappy changes and 2 feeds later I eventually got him in bed at nearly 10pm! I had been trying from 7:15pm! I did manage to have a shower and wash my hair but I could hear him crying the whole time.

Sara the health visitor came yesterday. She is really nice and I've seen her loads of times before with Leo. We went through lots of leaflets and information and answered loads of questions about health etc. Oscar was weighed and he was 9lb 7oz which is following along the 75 centile line, pretty much the same as Ellis.

Sara mentioned that if I get very heavy discharge, stringy discharge or lots of blood/clots that I could have an infection. Well as it happens I've started to get stringy discharge so I'll ring her tomorrow just to double check that is what she said.

We talked a lot about feeding and about how Oscar is very colicky and has green poo because of it. He does cry a lot and I've started him on Infacol to see if that will help.

We won't be seeing Sara now for another 2 weeks but it will be a home visit which is nice.

Rob went to register Oscar yesterday afternoon so it is now official, yay!

Can't believe how quickly baba is growing. He is in size 2 nappies now and will shortly be wearing 0-3 month clothes. I really will need to buy clothes for him though as he is totally out of season with the clothes I used for the older boys. All the newborn outfits I have are short sleeved, short legged rompers and short dungarees and little t-shirts. Really not warm enough for a newborn so he is living in grows which to be honest is just the easiest thing anyway.

I've already started to get sad about getting rid of all my baby/maternity stuff. I will have to do it one day but I just can't let go yet, so I won't. I can bag/box it up and get rid when I'm sure we have finished, in about 10 years from now!

Blogging progress is still very slow but I feel like I have to do these little updates before I forget it all! I have notes for the first week or so of Oscar's life so I can do that any time.

Going to phone the car insurers tomorrow to see if they will let me drive. Fingers crossed. Think Rob is going back to work Monday so I will need to start lifting Leo soon. He isn't too heavy though so shouldn't be too bad.

Late night again but if I want to get anything done then that's just how it will have to be.

CONFUSED - 39 WEEKS

My brain is so frazzled right now that I don't even have the energy to blog. I will try though.

Still feeling really rough, blocked up nose, tight chest, hard to breathe sometimes, headache, cough etc. Not nice and I just want it gone.

Thursday is quickly approaching and I still haven't made my mind up about what I want to do. I wish I could see into all the different futures.

I could wait to go into labour and to see if the contractions help to turn baby, or I could wait to go into labour before the c-section so at least I know baby is ready and we both get some good hormones for milk supply etc. I could have a vaginal breech birth which after looking into it a bit isn't that uncommon, or I could just go in on Thursday and have poor baby whipped out of his warm little home into a theatre room filled with bright lights and people doing stuff to him. The only plus I can see to this is getting my diastases sorted out, but is it really worth it?

I'm seeing the midwife tomorrow so will try and ask her some questions but I have to take the boys with me so I doubt I'll pick much up.

I did the pelvic tilt thing today for about 30 minutes I had my bum resting up on a mound of pillows and then for the rest of the day the baby has been really active. I think maybe one of his feet has shifted out of my pelvis as I can feel kicks again down on my right side. He has just generally been moving a lot more and I've had a few Braxton Hicks today. Not been feeling all that good really. I've been staying active though, walking Ellis to school and going to Sainsbury's which actually ended up being quite a struggle.

This nasty cold has made me blow my nose quite hard and all the coughing has hurt my tummy and my bum! I have a bad pile now and I've been treating it loads but it hasn't helped. A real pain in the arse, pun intended!

What is the right decision!? I have no gut instinct or feeling about any of it. All I know is that I'm scared of c-section and vaginal delivery now. I'm not prepared for either.

Hopefully speaking to Judith tomorrow and then someone on Thursday will help. It seems so far away though but also very close. I need help, but no one can help me. No one can tell me what the right thing to do is.

Everyone keeps saying that it will all be fine and will work out one way or the other. I so hope it does but that doesn't stop me doing my head in about it all. I have tried. I have tried to just pick one option and be okay with it but 2 seconds later I change my mind!

Can't believe how active Nugget is today. He hasn't moved around just pushes out and makes bump all pointy and hard. I pretty much decided over the last 2 days though that this will be my last baby, unless we have an accident of course.

I wish Rob was home. He is with his mates though having a little farewell party, but he can't drink just in case, which is rubbish for him.

Been really struggling with acid indigestion too. Last night I slept sitting up but it was still quite bad and I had to go to the toilet twice during the night and Ellis was awake 3 times. I'm not sure what is causing it. He says it is the heater/boiler or his radiator but I don't believe that is it.

Been trying to just chill out with the boys. Chatting to them, lots of cuddles that sort of thing. It's the only thing I can do really as I can't play fight etc. It is really nice time with them though and I'm trying hard to cherish it. Ellis is growing up so fast and Leo is really starting to make progress with communicating to all of us. I'm really worried about how I will split my time once number 3 is here. Again, I'm sure it will work out just fine!

I have done 39 week bump pictures but they are on the PC and I'm on the laptop so will have to post them tomorrow or something.

Even my blog post is all over the place!

So tired and need sleep but just can't sleep. One way or the other it will all be over soon and the recovery process and looking after a larger family can commence. Not long and all this will be a distant memory.

SPA - 37 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

Went to the spa today with Mum and it was ace.

The day started off okay. I had a terrible nights sleep and it was my turn for a lie in. I only dozed though as Rob put the heating on so I had dry mouth, cracked lips and it makes loads of noise plus the boys had their music blasting downstairs so I just couldn't settle. It was nice to just chill out.

I got up, got my stuff ready and went to meet Mum.

We arrived early at the spa so went into BHS for a drink and cake before going in.

We just relaxed in the pools, chatted about loads of rubbish and just generally flopped about.

We had treatments booked. Mum went for a full body massage and I went for a Watsu.

I filled out the form saying there was nothing wrong with me etc, then I was greeted by Cerah, a very nice young lady and I immediately relaxed as I had pictured a hairy bloke was going to be doing it.

I had a shower then I sat on some steps in the pool and she attached some floats to my calves and thighs and after taking a few breathes with my eyes closed she came behind me and propped my head on her shoulder. She then proceeded to float me around the pool, moving my arms and legs and pressing on pressure points etc which was really, really relaxing. I got a bit cold at times but other than that I would recommend it. At the end she propped me up against the wall and left me hanging there for a few minutes. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to get up, open my eyes or what. She eventually came over and said, "you ok?" and I opened my eyes. I was allowed another minute in the pool just to wake up a bit and then I got out to meet Mum in the rest area.

I was quite cold so wrapped up in a lush fleece blanket with a cup of hot water. We didn't want to move after that. It took us a while be we eventually got ourselves moving and walked up the high street to find a nice pasta place to eat in.

After scoffing some delicious food we made our way back to the bus stop and home.

Baby hasn't moved one bit and is still kicking and scrabbling at my down below bits. Hopefully Tuesday will be more successful.

I forgot to mention that I nearly fell over today. I went to the toilet with the silly slipper things on and stood on the wet floor and went flying. Luckily the wall stopped my fall so I didn't hit the floor but I certainly pulled my pelvis, back and hurt my hand on the wall.

Baby could be here in 3 days. I know he could be here sooner than that but I doubt he would come early.

Off out tomorrow and then Monday I will spend time getting me and the house ready for potentially having the baby on Tuesday.

The boys had an ace time with Daddy today who took them to the soft play place. I saw a couple of videos and they looked so happy. Wish I could have been there too, as well as gone to the spa. Can't have it all though and it must have been lush for them to have had Daddy time. More of it to come too.

Going to switch off for a few minutes before trying to get some shut eye.

POSITIVE THINKING - 37 WEEKS, 4 DAYS

How quickly did the last 37 weeks go! Bump picture.

I had a midwife appointment the day after I saw the registrar and I'm not sure if I've written about it yet. I might have done on topflumps but not sure.

Anyway I saw Judith and she asked how I had got on at the hospital, I told her about it being breech and she was like "NO!" . She was really surprised. She tested my wee, did my blood pressure and felt my tummy and I think she didn't really know which way it was until I told her. She listened to the heart beat which took her a while to find as she was searching in a different place to normal because of him being breech but when she put the Doppler on the normal place she heard it. She said my babies are weird. Thanks!

My blood test results were missing so she said she would chase them up and then booked me in for 3 weeks time when I said I would of more than likely had it by then, if not then on the day of the appointment.

We did discuss going for a natural breech delivery but seeing as he is a footling breech, feet down rather than bum, this increases the risks quite a lot. Basically the cord can fall out and get squashed causing harm and possibly death to the baby. Not a risk worth taking.

I had my active birthing class on Tuesday and I was in a right strop. A lovely lady brought her son in and talked about her lovely active, natural birth that went really well. I was sulking of course.

I had a cry on the way home and I was still sulking when I spoke to Rob so he got pissy with me without really realising that I was having "issues!" Can't blame him, I was a right stroppy cow but I feel like I had a right to be, in a way anyway. We had a chat and he said the same things that everyone says, and all the things I already know so I basically told him to shut up and just give me a hug.

I'm starting to feel a bit better about the whole situation. I think the closer it gets the more relaxed I'm getting as time is running out. Going with the flow, being in the now, whatever attitude, what will be will be is all stuff I know but unable to put in to practice at the moment. I think if someone says it to me one more time I might scream out loud rather than just in my head!

I sound like a right spoiled brat! Here I am with a healthy baby boy in my belly ready to come into this family and all I can fixate on is how he is going to get here. I haven't even thought about the after bit, apart from if I have a section how awful it will be ;o)

I keep looking around at all the baby stuff and can't actually get my head around the fact that a little baby will be here very shortly. I need to start focusing more on how I feel about the baby and how he is going to fit into our family and preparing the boys for his arrival. Leo is so cute with bump, like Ellis was really. Ellis this time isn't so interested although he did put his hand on it today to have a feel.

We really don't have a name sorted. Nothing. I've been testing some out on Ellis but he doesn't like anything, apart from Sugar or Rocket. I really don't want to send out "the" text message with just baby arrived on it. I want to introduce him with a name as a person. I sound crazy I'm sure but I'm used to that. Rob really doesn't like the one name that I have come up with and to be honest even I'm not 100% sure of it, not like I was with Ellis and Leo. I didn't think I would get to have Leo's name though. Maybe we will try some names out when he is here before sending out the message. I've told Rob not to put anything on Facebook until we have spoken with family and sent out the text to close friends. I don't want anything on there until we know that he and I are safe and well.

I pretty much have everything ready. There are little things outstanding but they could be grabbed at the last minute. I need to make sure that camera batteries are charged and memory cards are cleared though, so will sort that tomorrow. The other thing outstanding is my birth plan. I've pretty much thrown that out the window for now. If things change on Tuesday then I will write it but for now I'm not actually going to bother.

Been feeling more tired recently. I'm sleeping okay when the boys let me. I have to regularly get up with one or both of them during the night and I need a wee break too so it is very disturbed sleep but not too painful like it was before. It does hurt to turn over, especially when Rob is here but my hips don't ache which is nice.

I've started to get a lot of acid indigestion which isn't nice so I'm trying to prop myself up a bit. I think because baby is breech and not engaging, and is getting a lot bigger, that he is pressing up on my stomach and causing it. Not much longer now.

Waking up with bloated legs and feet now which can feel uncomfortable at times. Rob gave me a really lush foot rub the other night and I've just asked for another so looking forward to that.

Tuesday is coming around fast but not fast enough if you know what I mean. I just want it done with now. I want some answers. But I am trying really hard to enjoy my time with the boys. By the end of the day I'm tired and touchy but we do have fun. This week has been quite hard as it has been half term but we have done some different things and chilled out together too which has been nice.

Having a lie in tomorrow morning then off to the spa in the afternoon. Really looking forward to a pamper day. It may well be my last lie in too if baby comes on Tuesday, which is possible.

I'm keeping my hopes up though that he might be turned, I am pretty sure he won't turn himself now but you never know I suppose. Fingers crossed for it all.

WATSU - 36 WEEKS, 6 DAYS

Been feeling a little better the last 2 days or so. I'm not great about the situation I find myself in but I'm coming to terms with it a bit more. I'm really not looking forward to the experience of the ECV and hopefully, fingers crossed I won't have to go through it.

Been trying to get baby to turn by being on all 4s, sitting and bouncing on my birthing ball but this makes my feet really puffy, and visualising and telling him to get his head down! It might work, you never know.

The only good thing about the baby being in this position is that he isn't putting any pressure on my pelvis which is great. I do get sciatic pain still and it makes my left leg give way suddenly with some shooting pain but I can deal with that much better than constant burning and stinging of my pelvis whenever I move.

The kicks to the bladder and bum area are a constant reminder from the little bugger that he still hasn't turned. I keep getting my hopes up every now and then when I feel a bit different but so far he is still staying in exactly the same place. He has been like it for 10 weeks now so I suppose he must be comfortable.

Booked into the spa with Mum. Going to have a Watsu. I think you basically float about while being gently moved around by a therapist. It's costing an arm and a leg for it but I can't wait! Hopefully all the relaxing will get baby round.

Time is ticking away. Only 9 days until ECV, 37 weeks pregnant tomorrow and baby will be here very soon. I think my thoughts are so consumed with how he is going to get here that I haven't been thinking about the after bit yet. It's making me tired just typing about it.

In need of sleep, healthy food and drink, and some alone time. Too busy for that though.

FRAZZLED - 36 WEEKS, 1 DAY

What a day! I should do a blog today really while it is all fresh in my mind but saying that my mind is frazzled and I'm ready for bed really. Might watch some crap on telly, veg with Bobert then go to bed. Had very little sleep last night and was in and out of bed so been tired all day anyway.

Here are some pictures of bump just because.

36 weeks with Nugget.

36 weeks with Leo.

Will do a post tomorrow night, with my laptop in bed.

BONDING - 35 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

Piles are a pain in the arse! I've suffered with them for a long time but since having Leo they have been quite bad and since being pregnant again, they are really bad. I've been using the cream and stuff but it isn't making any difference. Not too uncomfortable though so that's good.

Been feeling a lot better recently, physically. Emotionally I'm all over the place. One minute I'm so positive, happy and excited, the next I'm shit scared, miserable, stressed etc. I'm pretty sure it is normal to be like this and Rob is coping quite well with all the ups and downs.

One concern that I have at the moment is bonding with the new baby. With Ellis it took me around 3 months before I felt like I was close to my baby. There were a lot of things that played a part in this. I was a first time Mummy, I hadn't seen him leave my body and I didn't have the birth I expected, recovery for me was slow, his feeding didn't go well to start with and he lost weight and I just generally struggled I think so it was a job to get through each day. Leo on the other hand was completely different. I felt like I started bonding with him while he was in my tummy. I would talk to him, sing to him, read to him, call him him, would love feeling and watching his movements and then as soon as I pulled him up on to my chest I just felt it. Not really sure what "it" is but it wasn't foreign, it was warm and close. Feeding Leo was easy and not painful and my recovery was better, not great but a lot better, plus I knew how to do all the necessary things like changing a nappy so I could spend more time giving him love, cuddles and other attention. Sounds really bad that maybe I didn't do that with Ellis to start with but I'm sure I did, I just don't really remember it. I just remember working very, very hard.

So I'm not really sure what I'm trying to say or how to put it at least, but I just know that I am worried that I won't feel the same. Have to wait and see I suppose and to try not to put too much pressure on myself. It's going to be tough going I know that much but I just want to enjoy it all if possible.

Swelling is increasing nicely. Last night I sat on my ball on my PC and I must have been sat in one position for too long because as soon as I moved I realised that my feet were stinging. I showed Rob and he said I just had legs that went straight down to my feet. I had no ankles and my feet were massive. Rob could put a thumb sized dent in them which would last for a while. Not nice, not attractive. I sat with them raised after a quick rub from Rob and had some water but it didn't help that much so I ended up going to bed. I'll try and get a picture. I've realised that I haven't really posted pictures on this blog that much. I will try and rectify that, even if it is just random bump pictures or something.

I've really started to feel this pregnancy and I'm struggling more at this stage then I did with the first 2 pregnancies. I think I'm a bit older now, my body has been through a lot since 2006 and I have 2 kiddies to look after without Rob around as much. It's bound to take its toll but I keep going. Rob thanked me this evening for soldiering on and that he appreciated how hard I was working. That's always nice to hear.

Been really busy today. I tried to have a lie in but I couldn't sleep. I couldn't get comfy, the sun was shining in, the boys downstairs were really loud, the bloke outside was cleaning our car and Rob came in a few times. Admittedly on one occasion he brought me up a cuppa and a bowl of cereal which I really needed.

I eventually got up and started my hospital bag. It's 90% there now which is great. It isn't in a bag but it is all together on the side so just needs to be scooped up. A lot of the stuff that isn't in can't be packed yet because I use it, like the cameras, my hair brush, dressing gown etc. I don't have slippers yet so need to purchase some of those and I really need a different t-shirt to go with my new pyjama bottoms.

I also need to start work on my wish list (birth plan) so that I can complete all my notes and I want to make sure I have a TENS machine on Tuesday, so better e-mail Vivien about that.

Can't believe how close it is! Not as close as Naomi as she gave birth to a little boy, Harri, on Friday. He was 5lb 5oz and I believe they are still in hospital for now. I would think they would stay a few days to make sure he is eating well and putting on weight seeing as he is so early.

I don't know any details and I can't wait to catch up with her properly. I'm so happy for her that everything turned out well, but a little bit jealous that she has been through it, out the other side and now has her baby and can just move on. Does that make sense? I'm still a ticking bomb and she has her body back, without the extra 4/6 weeks of weight gain too! Shouldn't rush these things though and I know it is safer for baby to be inside for a while longer yet.

Hopefully be able to get a little bit of cleaning done tomorrow. The dust in this house is amazing! I know I don't clean enough but it's like I said to Rob today, once I've finished tidying so that I can clean, I'm too tired or the boys need attention and I can't do it! Will try at least to run the vacuum around the upstairs tomorrow. Want to clean the bathroom too. Shattered just thinking about it.

Okay, I'm off to try and get some sleep, not an easy task mind you but I'll give it a good go.

HORRENDOUS - 35 WEEKS, 2 DAYS

Last Tuesday, 1st February I was just 34 weeks pregnant I attended my first antenatal class and Naomi came to pick me up. I had started to have some back pain that morning which felt more like sciatic nerve pain then anything else and my pelvis at the front wasn't stinging so it was like it had moved and changed. I was struggling to walk and I wasn't particularly happy about it.

The class was run by Judith, my midwife, so she spoke to me quite a bit as she knew me and she had to discuss labour, without complications. I actually thought she did a good job and the only thing I didn't really like was when she said that they won't talk about breathing as surely she doesn't need to teach us how to breathe! So glad I have active birthing classes to go to.

I was still feeling horrid when I got home and walking, bending or pretty much just moving was becoming more and more of an issue.

By Wednesday I couldn't move and was in a lot of pain. Thankfully Sarah kindly took Ellis to school for me and then Mum came over in the afternoon, picked Ellis up and took him to his music class. So pleased to have had the rest but it didn't do any good and I was still in agony the following day.

In all my pregnancies, I have never wished any of them away but last week was just horrendous. I was in so much pain and I couldn't even live my life! I just wanted baby out! I was done, ready for it to be over.

I spoke to my midwife and she said they could prescribe Codine to help with the pain but it would cross the placenta to the baby so decided against that and then I spoke to the physio who said I was doing everything right and that I just had to put up with it really. I was doing everything I could to move the baby off my back, which is where I thought it was. I was leaning over my ball, doing ball dancing, going on all 4s which was when I was in the most pain so didn't do that too much.

Anyway, Saturday arrived and Rob let me have a lie in but then I just ended up staying in bed all day. I got up at about 4:30pm, gave Leo some dinner then got ready to go out. The pain was still there but not too bad.

On Sunday I was feeling so much better! We went into town and did quite a lot of walking and I was ok. I walked slow but it wasn't painful and even my front pelvis pain was gone. I was worried that doing all the walking would cause the pain to come back on Monday but, touch wood, since then I have been doing really really well. I feel really great actually, fat and bloated, achy and waddling a good un but not in pain. I get twinges but they are nothing compared to what I was getting.

So that's the sciatic pain story and now on to my Braxton Hicks. Thursday evening at Mum and Dads' I was having dinner and they started. I was getting hot flushes and a rock hard bump. It wasn't nice but easy to deal with. Then on Saturday night I was getting loads and loads, with some period pains too so I was almost thinking of timing them and they were keeping me awake too. I told Rob about it and he had a mini panic attack ;o)

I've had them since then but nothing as bad. Maybe the contractions helped to move baby off of the nerve it was sat on and that's why I can walk and move again.

I'm still obsessing over the position of the baby. I try all the time to work it out but I just can't. I mainly think he is transverse with his head on the left side. Seeing the midwife next Wednesday so hopefully she can work it out a bit better, if not I want a scan.

Rob has been helping out loads which is great as I'm starting to need the extra rest time and sleep isn't going so well. I can't get comfy, my hips ache, turning over is an arse and Rob still squashes me and pushes me to the edge of the bed. I wake up tired most mornings.

Baby clothes from newborn to 3 months are all pretty much washed. I have another load of washing, some ironing to do and then it all just needs putting away. I still haven't done my hospital bag and plan to do that this weekend coming.

I am so puffy that I can't even wear my wedding ring anymore and Mum came over today and said "what lovely chubby cheeks!" Great! I'm sulking now and wanting to eat everything in sight.

Naomi phoned me today, (I hope she doesn't mind me putting this) about some heavy discharge she was having and was wondering what to do. She is 36 weeks pregnant today. She was waiting for a call back from her midwife and I just said to put a pad on and to keep an eye on the volume and colour of it. She said she didn't want to open her packet of pads yet, which was quite funny. I tried to reassure her that everything was fine and that even if her waters had gone, there is still time and to not panic. I sent her a text an hour or so later asking her how she was and she replied that her waters had gone!!! I can't believe it! She is now in hospital waiting for baby. I am assuming that if nothing happens within a few days that they will induce her and get baby out. So she will be holding her baby in a few days time, or sooner! So strange that we won't finish our antenatal classes together and we were joking about being in hospital at the same time but that isn't going to happen. I just hope that everything works out well for her and baby and I can't wait to receive "the" text.

I've decided to revamp my birthing plan. For one thing I'm going to call it my wish list and I just want to make it very simple but with a few things on there that I know I don't want. Like I don't want them to keep asking me if I want to have my waters broken. I birthed out my bag of waters with Leo and she constantly asked if she could brake them and I didn't want it done. It just seemed so unnecessary. If the bag wanted to break then it would itself and also I didn't want the contractions to kick up a notch which can happen with no water to cushion the blow. So will work on that and post an updated version soon.

I still have loads to do and keep putting it off cause I just think baby will come late as per the 2 boys and that I have plenty of time yet. Naomi thought she would be early but not this early!

Antenatal class this week was good too. It was taken by Marcia who I really like and she is very organised and energetic which makes it much better. It was about complications and pain relief. Again she did say the thing about they won't teach us how to breathe but other than that it was informative and positive considering it was to do with complications.

I stayed behind to ask a couple of questions and she was very helpful. I asked about the fact that I had a very full bladder at the time of pushing and asked if that could have caused my slight bladder prolapse and she said yes. She said it might also have caused me to have to push so damn hard to get him out as the gap would have been compromised by the full bladder. I asked about the cannula too and if I did actually need one in place straight away and said yes I would need one but could sign a waiver form and not have it. Choice is mine. She then suggested I meet with Steph Withers at the hospital to discuss my options a bit further. I might do that.

Have the consultant appointment on Tuesday. Think I may go anyway but won't bother getting Rob to take the day off. Shazza was having the boys so that I could go to my antenatal class and Naomi said that she could help out to cover the extra time that I would be at the hospital. That aint gonna happen now though. Will have to sort something out.

Feeling okay. Thankful to not be in major pain and looking forward to seeing baby but also scared to death about it all. I'm not worried about pain but worried about how it will all work out, what will happen this time sort of thing and then I worry about recovery and how the boys will deal with etc etc. I can't stop worrying and stressing. How can I get around that? My head is all confused and emotions are very close to the surface. I'm sure it will all work out but it's the not knowing that is doing me in.

So tired and I need to shower and wash my hair. Actually might just go to bed and wash my hair tomorrow while Leo is napping. Yeh that's a plan.

NAMES - 33 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

Nugget hasn't stopped wriggling today. Hopefully he is spending his time getting into a better position but it really has been all day movement, which has been nice. A few kicks to the bladder which wasn't so nice but other than that it's been lush.

Skin was feeling a bit stretched and itchy today and I'm just praying I don't get any more stretch marks. My tummy already looks like a road map of London, I just don't want it to expand any more.

Went out on date night tonight with hubby and we had a discussion about names and how I don't want a nameless baby so would like to have some ideas before he arrives. I have one name that I quite like and unless anything else pops up, then I'm set on it. The only problem is that Rob isn't keen on it. I'm open to other ideas if he should come up with any mind you. We also talked about a middle name and one came up that I'm really happy about too and goes really well with the first name I like too. It's actually made me feel rather excited which is a bit strange. Makes it more real I suppose as at the moment the getting ready stage is going very slowly and I feel like it isn't quite happening. I hope that makes sense.

Still swollen and will be now until after baby has arrived, so just have to put up with it.

Pelvis is the same too. Not worse, not better but manageable.

Boobs are huge and I'm snuggly fitting my 32FF bras. I'm still wearing under-wired bras and I will probably get away with it for a bit longer yet.

I still haven't managed to video any movement in my belly yet and I really want to get a bit, so will make an effort with that soon.

Rob is allowing me to have another lie in tomorrow so like he said, I should make the most of it and get some sleep. So that is what I'm going to do.

SULKING - 30 WEEKS, 5 DAYS

God I wish this baby would move as I can't stand having my bits kicked! It stings and is just generally not a very nice feeling to be having. I'm missing out on seeing the feet sticking out and stuff. Humf :o( I'm sulking.

We went swimming today which was ace and I loved taking the weight off my bones. I'm hoping to go again next week too if Rob doesn't mind. I am also hoping it will help to free up some space so that baby can move about a bit. Didn't work today but I have a few weeks left.

It's scary how quickly the time is passing now and I'm feeling so relaxed about it all that I have forgotten that I do actually need to get a few things ready. I am not prepared at all. I'm going to hopefully make a start tomorrow if Rob can take Leo food shopping with him again then I can crack on with moving some clothes around and getting Leo's room to be the nursery. Well, half nursery. He will still sleep in there but all the babies stuff will be in there as a base.

I have washing to do a few things to buy I'm sure. I know I need pads but can't remember which ones were the best, I need nappies, and I'm sure some other things so I better start making some lists.

Sharon still has the bath mat with a seat thing but I don't really need that back yet and Sally has the bouncy chair. I think she may still be using it though but will ask her nearer the time. I think she has some sleeping bags too but pretty sure I won't be needing them straight away either. It's really strange as I can't seem to remember anything! It's like I'm doing it all again for the first time. I don't remember feeling like this with Leo. I remember being really organised and knowing what I needed, what I had etc. Better get a move on before I start panicking about it. (Sally & Shazza if you so happen to read this, it isn't a hint, you know I would ask you anyway x)

Pelvis is quite bad most days now and I hobble, wobble, waddle around. Sometimes I can't get up from the floor so I have been trying to change Leo's nappy on the table, and getting them dressed stood on the sofa and things like that. I have been a bit naughty the last 2 day not wearing my stretchy bandage but I just needed a break from it. It will be back on tomorrow.

It is very, very painful to turn over in bed. I try not to do it but my hip starts to ache if I lie on it for too long and currently I have a rather sore left arm from my flu jab I had on Thursday, so sleeping well is a bit tricky at the moment. It isn't helped by Leo still waking up during the night. I try to ignore him but it doesn't work as I end up lying there awake listening to him. We have got into the habit of bringing him in with us which long term isn't going to work as Nugget will more than likely be bed sharing every now and then as I will feed lying down and snoozing, like I did with the other 2. It will be a bit of a squeeze with wriggly Leo in the bed too.

Speaking of Leo, I really don't think I have prepared him enough. I used to show Ellis pictures and explain it all to him, keep telling him that his baby brother was going to come out etc etc. Leo kisses and cuddles bump but I'm sure he has no idea what is in there. I need to at least have a go at explaining it to him a bit. Ellis seems to grasp the idea that a baby is in there and might need to be cut out as this rate rather than coming out my middle. And yes I did tell him that is where babies come out. I didn't see the harm and he wasn't phased by it at all.

Wish I could have a flash forward to the labour and delivery. Just to see how it goes and that everything is all right.

Starting AB classes on 18th Jan for sure and my antenatal group sessions start at the beginning of February and thankfully my ace mates, Sally & Charlotte have agreed to watch the boys for me so that I can go. Cheers guys xxx

Right that's me done. Off to bed at just gone 11pm, not good but Rob is on the early shift tomorrow, hurrah!

OUCH - 30 WEEKS, 2 DAYS

Spoke too soon about my pelvis. It has been killing me for a couple of days now. In bed last night it was horrid. I could hardly move and when I did it really hurt! Been trying to nurse it today and I have tried to do my pelvic floor exercises but it actually hurts to do it!

I can't understand why I feel so shattered and groggy all the time. I had a reasonable nights sleep last night but I still went back to bed for an hour this morning and I'm still feeling tired. I would love to just stay in bed! Is it the weather, my continuing cold, pregnancy or something else?

Flu jab tomorrow, great!

NEW YEAR - 29 WEEKS, 6 DAYS

I'm getting really behind with this blog and things change so rapidly at this stage so I need to keep on top of it.

I'm comfortably in to the third and final trimester now and I am certainly starting to feel it.

Feet, hands and lower legs are swollen a lot of the time now and I think my face is puffy too.

I've not been well now for quite a few weeks and it has really brought me down. The boys haven't been sleeping through either so I haven't been getting any quality sleep. I had a lush lie in today though as I slept until gone 12pm! I obviously really needed it. But then today I've felt like I haven't quite woken up all day, a bit fuzzy.

If allowed to sleep, then I do sleep okay. I'm not uncomfortable and turning over doesn't hurt yet which is great news. I don't really turn over though and spend 99% of my time on my left side.

Since the scan I have been totally obsessed by what position the baby is in. I am constantly prodding and feeling to see if I can work it out. I'm pretty sure it still isn't head down and most of the movement happens on top of my bladder or slightly to the left. It isn't a nice feeling either and I'm feeling totally deprived of feeling all the lovely kicks and feet sticking out etc that I had with Leo. Makes me feel a bit sad. I do realise there is plenty of time for him to turn but I'm convinced he won't and it bugs me every day. I did find this though on my growingdollop blog.

Most babies are born headfirst, but at the end of pregnancy, around 3% to 4% are found to be breech. Before 37 weeks of pregnancy, breech presentation is much more common - about 20% of babies at 28 weeks are breech, and 15% at 32 weeks. Before term, which is defined as 37 weeks, it doesn't matter if the baby is breech, as there is always a good chance that she will turn spontaneously. Some babies do turn by themselves after this time, but it is much less likely, and some preparations should be made to decide how delivery is going to take place. About 10% to 15% of breech babies are discovered for the first time late in labour!

Not sure if I mentioned before but a couple of weeks ago my boobs started to sting on and off and I was pretty sure they would soon start to leak, and they have. I don't need to wear a pad or anything but when I shower I notice that first bit of milk is starting to leak out.

I'm actually not looking forward to breastfeeding this time. I don't really know the reasons why yet but when I do I will write them down.

I'm still wearing normal size 14 jeans but my maternity ones are definitely comfier. I wear mostly maternity tops and I'm generally sticking to the same things.

I went to my physio appointment and she measured my gap in my stomach muscles and I am at 5cms. The most it should be is 3cm so I am now wearing my stretchy bandage everyday. I haven't found it as uncomfortable to wear as I did first time around. I now just need to be careful and take care of my muscles. Hoovering and food shopping are the 2 big NOs. I don't have to see her again now, unless I have any problems, until after the birth.

I've also seen the midwife but it was such a fast appointment and I could just tell that she didn't want to be there and was just getting through her day. My tummy is measuring correct for my dates, blood pressure was 110/60 which is quite low for me and we heard the heart beat. She was supposed to take some blood but said she would leave it until next time. I see her next on 26th Jan and I will be just over 33 weeks.

I've started to get fizzy hands the last few days. I think this is just another pregnancy symptom and I remember getting it before. Doesn't last too long which is good.

Pelvis is still up and down. It isn't anything like it was with Leo thank God but I still have plenty of time to go. I does hurt, but I just ignore it as much as possible.

I've really started to slow down too. I can't do anything in a rush and it's an effort to get up. Not sure if that is because of the pregnancy or because I haven't been well for so long. I just don't have any umff. Hopefully it will come back soon as I still have so much to sort out before baba arrives.

Now that we are in the new year I must admit I am starting to shit myself. I'm really quite nervous about it all. I'm hoping this is just a stage and I will come out the other side but at the moment I keep getting butterflies and I want to cry. I'm not too worried about the labour it's just dealing with the end of the pregnancy, the recovery of birth and also looking after 3 young children. It's a very daunting prospect. I don't do a good enough job of looking after the house as it is and meal times are just crap, and I can only see it getting worse not better. It really worries me as I don't want to live in a dirty house and I need to make sure Rob has clothes ready for work, it just all feels like a lot. Feeling very overwhelmed and scared. I'm sure it will turn out fine and I will cope.

Off to bed now to try and keep up with getting some good sleep. Will hopefully do 30 week post with measurements and pictures.

PUFFY - 27 WEEKS, 4 DAYS

This evening Rob has heard the heart beat, felt him moving and then tomorrow he will see him! How exciting.

I got out the shower tonight and noticed that my feet and legs are puffy. I suppose it is quite sudden but my shower was quite hot so I'm putting it down to that. A few hours have passed and they are still puffy so maybe that's just the way they will be now.

Feeling very tired at the moment but I have been very busy. I'm soldiering on like a trooper though. Well I think so anyway.

Getting excited/nervous about the scan tomorrow. Hope the weather isn't too bad but as least we have our 4x4 now so we should be okay. Will update on car soon.

Very late night again for me but I am having the lie in tomorrow which is great as I bet the kids will be in with us early anyway.